Larry The Snail had a interesting day but to understand it you have to go way to the beginning... Larry Buck Wild came out of his mother in 1492 which was really cool because Columbus (a ugly human) had discovered a new continent, it was in the papers. Anyway his mom decided that there life would be better in the new world so they hopped on a boat and off they went.

The boat they were riding was cool. There room was pretty nice. It was made out of the finest material, popsicle sticks. The sails were made out of super quilted toilet paper so that they could steer the boat well. The ocean was pretty calm the first night. But then, the second night there was a raging storm…

Oh poop thought Larry, he knew the precautions that had to be taken but he could not resist. His girlfriend Shaniqua Dajiggalous Margoon was on that boat also, so he had to save her. Quickly (or slowly) he made his way to the other room he found her unconscious on the poop deck! Quickly he picked her up, shoved her in some human feces and then he jumped in with her...

The reason there was human feces was because it was the main fuel source to use back then. It worked like a charm. Also if things got really bad and the lost food, they could eat that! I mean like, there’s protein, vitamin A, vitamin C, H2O and more! So it was perfect. Anyways, they got into cover when they heard a big, CRACK!

“Oops sorry that was me,” said Shaniqua, “You're awake? Oh I love you so much.” As Larry and Shaniqua were making out Larry’s mom came in. “Ok you two love snails come on out and by the way it smells amazing in here was that you Shaniqua?”
“Yes ma’am,” so they exited and were blinded by light…

But, in that moment, Larry’s mom Deglestia Hardunkichud, was blown away and off the boat! All they heard from her was a faint scream, as the air was being ripped from her tiny lungs. She was then swooped up by an eagle that swallowed her in one big gulp! Larry screamed,”Mother!!!!!!!!!” Then he fainted. Or so he thought. But what really happened is Shaniqua had hit him on top of the head with her snail shoes…

Blackness. That’s all he could see then he opened his eyes and there sat Shaniqua with a devilish glare. Then he noticed he was in chains and so was this random girl, and boy was she hot even for snail standards. “Shaniqua quick get me out of this!”
“No can do, you see I hired that eagle to kill your mother and to get her up there I had to use my special powers”
“You monster,” said the very hot snail, “Agreed, and to think I liked you!”
“I had to gain your trust first then I could crush you beneath my feet!”

But what Shaniqua didn’t know is that Larry always keeps his secret metal cutters in his shell. He keeps him there because they are a tool he uses for his day job. So while she was talking, he had broke the chains, that so entrapped him to the deck. He picked up a mound of feces with his eyes in one quick motion, and threw it at her! SPLAT! She fell on the side of her shell as he slid towards her…

Then he remembered that hot snail… Quickly he went over to her and broke off the chains “Lets get out of here quick” said Larry urgently. “Agreed, I hate her and to think I thought she was my sister.”
“REALLY! That was my girlfriend, well my ex girlfriend now.” So quickly they jumped off. It turns out the boat landed three hours ago and thats why no one helped them.

Once they got on land they raced up to the top, at a speedy .0005 miles per hour! It was so quick! It was faster than molasses! They slid with all the speed they had and once they got up they were surprised. In front of them stood something one snail should never see. They saw a snail slime factory. It was disgusting. They came all this way for a new life and what they got instead was jail. An ugly human came and picked up Larry. He took him inside the factory and locked him in a glass cage. He was to be tested on…

Blackness...thats all he could think of, he saw nothing else and had no hope. Then he remembered something, something that got his mind going, it was that snail and the only reason he was still alive is because of her. “Keep thinking, don’t stop thinking,” thought Larry.Then he opened his eyes and examined himself. He was enormous, well at least for snail standards, now don’t get me wrong he’s only about the size of a human shoe but he was buff. As he was admiring his new body a human walked in with a grim smile…

He entered a white, saline smelling room and was immediately grabbed to be taken away. But, with his new size, he had such a strength that even they couldn’t take him away He hit someone with his bulging eyeball and they went flying! He also realized he could slide as fast as a running toddler. He went to a table that held scalpels and other sharp tools and tried to grab one. But then he felt a sharp prickling pain in his flesh. He blacked out...

“Jeez” said the human, “all we wanted to do was make you awesome and then experiment, we weren’t going to kill you.” The human grabbed a long needle and began to inject Larry, Larry felt even stronger. “Yeah you like that don’t you, sadly this has only worked on you, all of our other patients are dead” Larry didn’t like the sound of that. He still doesn’t know how he did it, but he broke a hole in the wall and escaped. The human was just staring dumbfounded and didn’t even make an attempt to get him. Once he knew he was out of shot he called for the snail whose name he did not know and finally she appeared…

The snail appeared and yelled,”Which way did he go!”
“Uhhhhh… you can talk back?”
“I can do more than that,” Shaniqua said as she fiercely pulled out a sword. She stabbed him on the foot and he screeched in pain. He was kind of a weenie though because the sword was as big as a needle.
“Pathetic human! Where did he go!”
But, in that moment someone had stepped on Shaniqua…

It was one of the fattest human she’s ever seen and that was the end of Shaniqua… Maybe… But lets get back to Larry you see as he was running away he noticed he had powers, like somehow he chopped down a tree with laser vision and he plowed through a fully grown human. Not that he didn’t love his new powers but he wanted his old life back and it was right then and there that he swore that he would kill every human on Earth...

He slid into a gas station 40 miles away and looked around. The people around him screamed! They saw a look in his eye that made them want to run home to their mothers. He yelled at them,”Someone give me a ride to the nearest utility store. Now!”, he then shot his laser beams at the register to frighten them. He then jumped up onto someones head and controlled them with his mind. They walked to there car and drove him. He told them to buy a list of things, and they did. After all that he slid back to where he landed on his ship. He then made the most devious thing…

He made two machines actually one that would enhance his power and making him the strongest living organism on Earth and the other on was a bomb to detonate in case his plan didn’t work. But of course it would...

Lets go back to Shaniqua poor girl even though she was evil she looked horrible her shell was half crushed and she decided to go back to the boat but when she got there she saw something that screamed pure murder in her ear…

“Hey, remember me? I had a few enhancements done and now I’m totally like the evilest thing on Earth. Wanna join me?” She then slid to him and embraced him. But, he smacked her, a little too hard. She went flying. Oh no, he thought to himself. He then slid to her with lightning speed and she was furious. She smacked him twice as hard and…

He just stood there like it was nothing, he laughed evilly as he mocked her. “Your adorable but so weak, with my new power nothing can stop us, now lets get you patched up.” He put her in the enhancer and she regenerated even stronger but not near as strong as Larry. “I know that we’ve had our differences but you could be my slave and we could rule the world together!”...

“I guess so big boy,” said Shaniqua. He laughed an evil laugh and she just stood there like, “Fo’ reals right now?”