Random Cat | Teen Ink

Random Cat

January 10, 2014
By Anonymous

Act 1. Scene I.
[Empty street. An empty phone booth is in one corner.]
Enter GINGER.
GINGER- What’s that? A call for help?
[GINGER dashes into phone booth. Out comes]
RANDOM CAT!!!!!!


Act 1. Scene II.
[GINGER is sitting at table, reading. There is a piece of paper near him. Enter BIGGLES, who picks up the paper and reads,]
Random Cat Rap.
Out to fight crime is Random Cat,
Who survives, not a bird nor rat
Comes out on top, does Random Cat,
Sends crooks back to jail where they sat.
BIGGLES- What’s this? Random Cat Rap? Who’s Random Cat?
GINGER- [blushing and snatching paper away.] Oh! Just a rap I made up.
BIGGLES- Who’s Random Cat?
GINGER- Some random cat. Obviously.
BIGGLES- [looks at GINGER with narrowed eyes.] You might be interested to see today’s paper.
GINGER- Errr..Why?
BIGGLES- Listen. [begins reading aloud.] Mysterious Cat Saves Girl From Fire. Last night, Amy Hunter, 9, was trapped in a burning building. All believed her lost, and neighbours were even then comforting her distraught mother. Suddenly Amy heard a sound from the roof. Then a black cat opened the skylight and pulled Amy out. “He had one of those name tag thingies,” Miss Hunter told us later. “All it said was Random Cat. He was wearing a red cloak, too. And a watch that was beeping.” Later the cat was observed running away down a side alley. Noone knows this mysterious cat, but wherever you are now, Random Cat, we love you!!
GINGER- [squirming] Why did you show this to me?
BIGGLES- You made the poem up?
GINGER- Uh, uh, I found it in the CD aisle of a supermarket. It’s not a poem, anyway. It’s a rap.
BIGGLES- Nice try, Ginger, but that won’t work. CDs haven’t been invented yet.
GINGER- Errrr
BIGGLES- What does that mean?
GINGER- Well, if you must know I woke up early morning, saw the newspapers, and was inspired to write that rap to the memory of a truly heroic cat.
BIGGLES- Rap hasn’t been invented.
GINGER- Well, I invented it then. My gosh, has there got to be a reason for everything I do?
BIGGLES- Okay, but…
GINGER- [as his watch starts beeping] Oh my goodness, I’ve got to go.
BIGGLES- Why is your watch beeping?
GINGER- It beeps on the hour! [runs away.]
BIGGLES- But it’s 9.30!!!
CURTAINS.


The author's comments:
This is kind of a fanfiction also. Anyone who reads Capt. W.E. Johns will know. For others, it's in the 1940s so that will explain some stuff.

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