In the world of baked goods there is good and evil. Naturally, cupcakes are sweet, yummy, and moist, they are the good side. On their side are breads, pies, and other sweets that are not baked, mousse, ice cream, etc; but of course cupcakes are the nicest. Then there are crumbly, dry, flat cookies. They are the cupcakes natural enemy. Cookies are the most evil sweet in the world of baked goods. As with everything good versus evil, there is a superhero for the good and super villain for the bad. The villain for the cookies is named Cookie Monster. He is a short, shaggy, dark blue fellow with beady eyes and a big mouth. The ugliest, nastiest creature to ever associate with baked goods.

Then there’s Mrs. Cupcake. Mrs. Cupcake is a sweet little old lady. She is short and paler than vanilla cupcakes, and her clothes match her favorite flavor, funfetti. She wears a calf length white dress with small polka dots of blue, red, yellow, green, and pink. She has bright strawberry frosting red hair, which is kept up in a mini beehive that resembles the top of a cupcake. Despite her wrinkles, Mrs. Cupcake has a youthful twinkle in her chocolate colored eyes.

Now years ago, Cookie Monster killed Mrs. Cupcakes husband, Mr. Bread. (she refused to take his name) Since the murder of her dear husband, Mrs. Cupcake swore to herself that next time she runs into Cookie Monster she would avenge her husband’s death, and kill Cookie Monster.
. . .

It was late one night and Mrs. Cupcake was working on a new recipe, orange cupcakes with cream frosting. The cupcakes were in the oven, so she was standing at the counter working on the frosting, which was still really quite runny. Mrs. Cupcake was humming to herself softly and looking out the giant panoramic window that wrapped around the entire kitchen into the beautiful clear night sky. Suddenly, there was a loud crash and shattering glass all over the floor. Mrs. Cupcake looked behind her to find none other than Cookie Monster. But with a closer look, she could see it was not the real Cookie Monster. This one was taller, and had a metallic quality about him that the real monster did not. An automated voice spoke loudly, “I killed Mr. Bread, and now I’m going to kill you! Then, when I’m done with Ms. Pie, I will be the only baker around!” The metal monster started shooting out cookies like frisbies going one hundred miles an hour. Mrs. Cupcake was old, but she had cat like reflexes, faster than humanly possible, and dodged every cookie shot at her. Now that she had Cookie Monster alone, she was determined to avenge Mr. Breads death. But how could she do that with hundreds of one hundred mile per hour flying cookies coming at her? Mrs. Cupcake was still dodging when she noticed the real cookie monster a few yards behind the fake one. He was holding a laptop, with a backpack at his side, snickering at the old lady, even though she was not getting hit. Mrs. Cupcake dodged her way over to her trophy cabinet and pulled out a gold trophy from softball. Back in the day, she was the best pitcher, still was honestly. She could aim better than anyone in the world. What better way to fight metal than with gold? But when she threw the trophy at the fake monster, it simply shattered into thousands of shards, as if it were made of glass. Of course, this did not stop Mrs. Cupcake. She noticed that the real monster was controlling the fake one with the laptop in his hands. Mrs. Cupcake grabbed her bowl of runny, cream frosting and chucked it right at the real Cookie Monster. Her aim was dead on, and the bowl landed upside down, right on the laptop. In return the laptop shorted out and the real Cookie Monster got shocked, meanwhile the fake Cookie Monster spat and sputtered and shook, before finally falling backwards, defeated. The only Cookie Monster left dropped his laptop, grabbed his backpack, and started throwing cookies at Mrs. Cupcake manually. Mrs. Cupcake, with super duper extreme black belt karate moves, karate chopped every cookie in half with her hands, sending crumbs everywhere. Then there was a sudden “DING!”. The cupcakes were done and Mrs. Cupcake was caught off guard in a moment of distraction. In this moment a cookie came flying at her face and landed smack dab in the middle of her forehead. The sudden force swept the little old lady off her feet and she flew backwards, landing just a few feet from the dinging oven. Cookie Monster, finding this hilarious, stopped throwing cookies and started laughing. He laughed so hard his mouth was wide open, his head thrown back, tears were rolling down his face and the shaggy fur that covered his body shook with joy. Mrs. Cupcake, although an old lady, moved at great speed, faster than anyone alive. She opened the oven and grabbed the cupcake pan with her bare hands; she could not get burnt. One by one she plucked the hot cupcakes out of the tin and threw them straight into Cookie Monster’s mouth. Each cupcake pushed the last one farther down his throat, while Mrs. Cupcake yelled “EAT MY CUPCAKES!”. Cookie Monster tried to scream in agony as his throat burnt and he choked wildy on the sweet goodness of the orange cupcakes. Now it was Mrs. Cupcakes turn to laugh until she cried as Cookie Monster went down, finally defeated. She had done it! Avenged her husbands death and got away with only a cookie sized red mark on her forehead.
. . .

Later that next day, Mrs. Cupcake pulled all the disgusting shaggy fur off of the dead Cookie Monster’s corpse. She pureed what was left of his body into tiny bits. With these bits Mrs. Cupcake made a very special batch of cookies, which was normally taboo but it was acceptable given the circumstances. Mrs. Cupcake got a spy to take the cookies downtown and feed the cookies to cookie lovers while she watched from a distant bench. Mrs. Cupcake giggled with delight as she watched tons of cookie lovers eat their leader in ignorant bliss.