It was a warm sunny morning, and there was an immeasurable amount of things going on. Spring was coming, and it was obviously in the air. Birds were flying back from the south, the trees were beginning to bud, and people all over the U.S. were planting flowers in their gardens. Levi Hawthorne was just one of the many people getting ready for spring after the unusually harsh winter, and this day was going to change his life forever.
Levi started the day with his usual cup of dark roast coffee with 2 packs of sugar, while getting out the box of Special K cereal. He was trying to stay healthy, as he was an outstanding athlete, and was trying to stay fit for the upcoming long and strenuous soccer season. Once he was done he headed out the door, as he would any other day, to head to work. When he headed down off his porch steps, he tripped over an ugly tabby cat in a comical black and blue dog sweater, and landed on a package. It had a label that read “TO CURRENT RESIDENT: HAPPY SPRING!”

As Levi opened the unusually oblong package, he heard a faint ticking sound, not unlike a clock. He opened it enough to see red sticks and a digital display that read 00:7 before chucking it toward his neighbor’s yard. It sailed through their open bathroom window, and into the sink. The roof launched off the house and into the backyard with a violent bang, while a geyser of water erupted from the pipes in the remnants of the bathroom. Angry-looking birds fell hit by the debris fell from the sky onto the house, making the wreckage turn into an almost catastrophic disaster.

Satisfied that he was safe from the threat of the bomb, Levi got into his custom-made Ford F-250 with flame decals on the side and neon green headlights. He started the engine and headed off down the street, thinking his life was back to being peaceful, when he got caught in some traffic on the Finke Bridge. He sat in his car for hours on end, realizing his boss would kill him for being late. He looked in the semi beside him, and almost screamed. His boss was driving it, and had an AK-47 in his hands. There were piles of cartridges for the gun, along with a bag of bullets. There was also a sack of grenades, with the pins all inside, so far. The AK-47 was aimed at the car beside him, which had people who looked like clowns and containers of white pills in the backseat. All three of the clowns held Colt revolvers, all aimed at the semi.

Levi reached back for his Desert Eagle under the center console, which held around 20 shots. The clip fell out, and got stuck underneath a seat. As Levi reached to get it, he heard glass shattering behind him, along with the sound of something whizzing behind him. When he grabbed the clip and turned around to see what had almost hit him, he saw his boss’s semi coming in to ram him into the other car. Levi swerved to the side his boss to try to avoid his boss; he heard a crunching sound under his truck, along with a car siren. He quickly stopped, dropped out of the car, and rolled even farther away from the semi.

His boss, seeing Levi had already run over the clowns, though accidentally, tried to stop, missed the F-250, and crashed through the barrier on the side of the bridge. James (his boss) jumped out of the semi, and grabbed onto the side of the bridge. He dangled helplessly onto the side of the bridge. Just as Levi got there, he heard a snapping sound, along with his boss’s screaming reaching a considerably higher pitch. Levi grabbed his arm, luckily not his supposedly injured one, and pulled him up. The second he got James up, the back of the semi landed on a large rock in the river, making it collapse and crush the bag of the bullets. The high pressure caused the bullets to explode, and one hit a grenade causing a spark. The spark lit the fuse usually lit by the pin, causing it to explode. The explosion caused all the others to explode, making a mild shockwave that knocked everyone above off their feet. James got up faster than anybody else, and started running back to town, presumably to the hospital. Levi heard a large chopping noise in the air, and looked up to see a helicopter. The helicopter swooped down by Levi’s boss, and James jumped in it. The helicopter took off south down the river, and disappeared behind a cloud.

Levi stayed at the crime scene until the cops arrived in their black vans and, after getting the story and the clown drug dealers, promptly sent him to the hospital for the after-wreck routine checkup. The doctors gave him an x-ray, CAT scan, and a MRI. He was released after a while, although not without having a receipt to a psychologist in a month and a water bottle full of green sleep medicine so he could sleep that night after the trauma of the day. Levi got back in his car and finally got to his job, which was where he worked as a sewage worker manager. He assigned everyone’s positions for the day and the next day, so since he was late, the fact he made the today’s assignment list yesterday saved the plant from going into disarray. He made the list for the next day, and then went on his lunch break.

Levi had mild salsa, Tostitos corn chips, and a quesadilla. He ate the quesadilla first, which strangely had chicken inside of it that he didn’t remember putting in. He then started on his chips and salsa. This is where things got even more interesting. He dipped the chip in and got the salsa just fine, but when he ate the chip, he found out there was sliced up Ghost Chili Peppers, the hottest pepper in the world, in his supposedly mild salsa. He ran screaming to the ice machine to get ice to cool his mouth off, but found that the ice machine was broken. He ran to the fridge opened it, and searching for a drink, he found a bottle of what looked like red Gatorade. He drank it, only to find it was a bottle of Tabasco sauce. He passed out on the floor, and it was half an hour before anyone found him and called 911. It wasn’t until around 10:00 pm. that he woke up, and his mouth was still spicy. He found himself in the ER, with a pizza beside him along with some chopped up peppers on the table.

Levi carefully sprinkled the peppers on the pizza, and wolfed down a slice. It wasn’t until he had eaten his second piece that he had a familiar, painful burning in his mouth. He spit out what he could, and ran for the door. Levi yanked on the door as hard as he could, bumped the oak table, and fell on the hard, tile ground. A multicolored vase of roses his coworkers had left him shook, tipped, and fell on his head, knocking him out cold yet again. Levi woke up on the floor with people all around him. The wing of the hospital he had been in had been closed, and the noise of the shattering vase set off a silent alarm. The security guards came, along with a few doctors, and found Levi on the floor, along with stained glass everywhere.

Levi was carried on a stretcher to a purple ambulance, where he was taken outside a remote facility and left for a few hours in the back of the van. He woke up and wondered where he was. When he realized there was no way out, he laid back down to wait. The doors finally opened, and an important-looking man with sunglasses and a tuxedo and papers in his hand surrounded by armed guards led him inside the building. There were guards everywhere, with retinal scanners on all the doors and security cameras covering every corner. He then was taken inside a room with pink teddy bear wallpaper covering the walls. There was a TV with only 1 channel, Sesame Street. Levi asked a guard and found out he was in the Safe and Sound Insane Asylum, where he was to spend the rest of his life. The last thing Levi said before he went to sleep for the first time in this monotonous building was “I need to get out of here.”