Separation. Isolation. Emptiness. The state of being lonely. A grey area where color used to stand. The loud dripping of your water pipes that are louder than your thoughts that you even dare to ponder. Broken floorboards. Mold stains. Cracks that trace your ceiling. 
What did we do to deserve this? We were just kids, yet isolation felt safe because it was all that we knew. People leaving one after one like seeds in the wind. Taking off to do better things. Where does that leave you? In the dark, surrounded by shadows that overtake your spirit. A voice calls to you saying, “come here child.” A light illuminates the darkness you came close with. A simple façade for the evil that tricks you repeatedly. Following the voice leads to self-destruction, but this voice is the only one there to pull you out of this pit. So, we take their hand, changing ourselves to feel better. This light could be addictions of all sorts: Alcohol, drugs, sex, or sleep. 
These wants become into needs; they control you, make you lash out on the ones you hold dear. Anger becomes a leading role in the play that you try to perform for the crowd. “Boo, get off the stage!” Our own heart even believes that we could do better. Yet you tell yourself, “Only a little longer,” or “just one more time.” Are you willing to accept the change that needs to happen for you to truly heal or will you fight it until it kills you? When the thought of change comes to mind it isn’t a concept but rather an essential part of our lives. Without it we would become programmed to go through the same tasks for eternity, becoming lifeless even. 
How can we manage being someone we really aren’t? A unified force that is nothing like our true selves. Simply put: we can’t. 
When society so desperately puts us into these roles and labels, we get depressed. It tosses us to the ground and tells us exactly what we need to be.  
However even in the darkest depths of hell; there is always a way out. You must realize that once someone leaves, it leaves room for someone new to enter your life. That’s when I met her. She was the embodiment of the sun, a smile, and laughter all combined. For the first time in forever someone really saw you and loved you.  
The moon finally went away while the sun started to rise. A beautiful array of reds, oranges, and yellows. The drip finally stopped, the world was quiet; the birds chirping, I could hear the wind, and the grass shifting from left to right. A smile is forming on my face. All because of the brightness that your voice brings to my life. You run away my Hurricanes and storms and bring forth sunshine and a summer breeze. My cold nights are no longer empty as your body heat lies next to mine. We held each other until our breathings align. A pleasure of our heartbeats thumping beside each other. I’ve never felt more alive than when I am with you. 
Roses and chocolates: romance is all that comes to mind when I think of you. I am no longer alone, but rather I have found my person. 
Then poof. I rose from a dream that seemed too real to be gone. A mist of sweet dreams, a smell so close but so far to grasp onto. A single tear fell down my face, I am alone once more. That deep voice of darkness crawls back into its place. Life has a funny way of showing you that you don’t deserve a break. No happiness, no laughing, just a silent drip that continues to fall after the storm clouds begin to form again.