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To Cheat Or Not To Cheat, That Is The Question
Human: Where am I?
Death: You're on the brink of death. I'm going to have to take record of how you died, and when. [clicks pen] Please, begin.
Human: What? How is this real?
Death[sighing, putting on reading glasses and flipping through an old, dusty book]: They always ask me that. Right here. It says it right here. Death is real. Death is natural. Now can we just get on with this? Time is money.
Human: Why do you need money?
Death: Just answer my questions!
Human: I don't want to!
Death: You have to.
Human: Nuh-uh.
Death: Yeah-huh.
Human: Nuh-uh.
Death: Just. Answer. The. Gosh. Darn. Questions! Then I'll be gone, you'll be dead, and everything will be happy happy joy joy.
Human[whining]: Can't I just cheat death? Like in the books? Why can't that happen?
Death: No, you can't.
Human: Why not?
Death: It isn't fair.
Human: Life isn't fair!
Death: But I'm not life. I'm death.
Human: ......Touche.
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