Part 1



Before today, God had no place in my life. I could care less about religion or whether or not I end up in heaven or facing the “fires of perdition” as my grandmother Mildred used to say. I always thought she was crazy anyway. Today was different. Today I felt God with me for the first time. I was browsing the internet looking to everything except learn about God. I had even planned to harass some Christians on Facebook. Instead I got the urge to look up the biography for one of my favorite bands; Flyleaf. I learned the most curious story. Turns out I’m just like Lacey.

“Hey! Are you coming to that party at Matt’s tonight?”
“Yeah, I guess. I hear he has some good stuff, you know?”
Liz looks at me strange for a moment before asking, “When did you start?”
I thought about changing the subject for a moment but decided to answer anyway.
“Like a few months ago. I’ve been doing it for a while now. It’s not really that big of a deal. You just get really giggly and then you want to eat a lot that’s all. I don’t know why our parents flip about it so hard you know? They used to do it too, like in the 60’s when it like first came out and stuff.”
Liz furrows her brow and then says to me, “It was around before then, but yeah I get your point.” She adds the last part sensing the dirty look she was about to receive. “What?”
“You’re such a nerd! You’re always like ‘well actually that happened in 19-whatever ner ner ner.” We both laugh at my impression of her.
“Hey I don’t sound like that!”
“Says who?” Using my Liz impression again, “Your own voice actually sounds different to you than to other people because of whatever…” I let out a loud sigh, “Dude the bells about to ring lets go.”

Later on in Food Prep

“Mattttt! What’s up?” I run up to Matt and give him a turbo bear hug.
“Whoa, I’m being mauled by ladies everywhere!” He smirks at me waiting for my reaction to his corny joke.
“There is no way you’re being mauled by girls everywhere. I and Liz are the only ones immune to your chronic stupid lame joke syndrome.”
“OHHH! So it’s like that?”
“Yeah, it’s like that!”
Matt chuckles a little, “So are you coming to the party?”
“FER SURE!”
“You know I really love it when you use that dork voice right?” Matt smirks again.
I retort instantly, “And I really love it when you use that sarcastic voice too?
Matt sticks his tongue out at me as Mrs. Culpepper enters the room. “Good Afternoon Class!” She rasps excitedly in her elderly voice. “Today we are going to make Red Velvet Cupcakes all from scratch using my grandmother’s recipe that I have printed out on separate sheets for each group. Now to break you off into groups, pay attention children. You know I don’t like repeat myself. All Right, we have Jessica, Melissa and Annie at table 1…”

Mrs. Culpepper’s voice fades out as I collapse into my own mind. I can’t stop hearing the melody of “Missing” one of my most favorite songs by Flyleaf. I can totally relate to her in this song. Something has been missing in my life for a while now. I just don’t know what it is.

“Yo, dorkface! We’re in a group together. C’mon.” Matt grabs my shoulder and stands over me.

“Sweet!”

“You really need to quit spacing out like that, it scares me you know?”

“What? Why?”

“I don’t know. It’s like your eyes go all dark and blank and stuff you. Back in the olden days they would have locked you up for that.”

“What would lock me up for, Matt?” I ask slightly annoyed.

“I don’t know. Let’s ask Liz or something she knows everything.”

“Ugh, Liz Liz Liz! Always the freaking know-it-all. But yeah you’re totally right because I want to know now myself.” I laugh.

“Hey does she know that you’re so jealous of her?”

“I’M NOT JEALOUS OF HER!”

“MRS. COLE!” Anger flaring in Mrs. Culpepper’s face, “What seems to be the problem?” Her beady eyes growing wider behind her banker style glasses.

“Nothing Mrs. C I tripped over my chair.” God I sure hope no one heard that last part. Truth is I’ve always been a little jealous of Liz ever since we were in elementary school. I can feel the heat from blushing cooling on my face as I finally take my seat. Matt was right, I really do need to stop spacing out. How long have I been standing here like this? A little bit confused I pick up the sheet and set to work and my thoughts are drowned out by the sound of teenaged chatter and electric mixers.