My life is tragic, really. You see, I’m a “go with the flow” kind of guy. Scratch that. I’m a go with the flow of blood guy. I don’t mean to brag but I’m handy when it comes to a knife and a couple of stitches... At least for the most part. Allow me to explain, my friend Bruce (last name not important, obviously.) had a form of cancer that couldn’t be cured. His death was inevitable unless his arm was amputated by a “professional surgeon” which I couldn’t bear to see. Being the amazing friend I am, I brought him into my house and took care of him. One may say I kidnapped him because he had no choice, but I see it as doing him a massive favor. So one day I went downstairs wearing a hefty gas mask, conveniently bought off of Amazon.com, and threw my own homemade tear gas. I went downstairs, stuck him with a syringe, and strapped him to my table.
I’ll never forget the sound of my knife cutting through his skin and watching the blood drip out of his arm. It sounded somewhat like the crushing of an orange under someone’s hammer, but with a lot more iron. Afterwards I stitched his arm up, feeling satisfied. Not even a little remorse or regret was shown that night. I don’t remember what happened after that, I completely blacked out. After I awoke from this blackout, I found myself washing more blood from my fingertips into my bathroom sink, where Bruce was lying unconscious in my bathtub with an unknown being. Yet there was still no sign of satisfaction in me. Not even a little.I trudged down to my basement to see where I had left my friend’s arm; I would rather not have
a bunch of flies and maggots swarming it, which may just raise a little suspicion with the cops if I ever have company over. I looked down and checked my phone, having one missed call from a blocked number. I was confused as to who this may be, so I ignored it and went about my work. There was a knock from the basement door. Knock knock knock knock. “Who could possibly be in my basement?” I questioned. I slowly reached my hand towards the handle and grabbed it, then even more slowly turned hearing it click. I flung the door open and grabbed the nearest object to defend myself if anything jumped out. A woman slowly walked up the stairs and heaved a screech as she started to bat at me with her hands frantically. I could easily tell she was tired.
“Whoa! Calm!” I said reassuringly. She made another strange sound with her mouth and flopped over in exhaustion. I reached down and picked her up bridal style carrying her to my room to rest. I stared at her confused as I placed her on top of my pillow. I shook my head and sighed. I went to my kitchen to think things over as I realized the time was slowly approaching one o’clock. I sat down and dozed off as I shortly afterwards (or so I thought.) I heard a stir from within my chambers. I ran as fast as I could to my room and opened the door allowing it to swing open with a huge thud as it hit the wall. The obviously dazed and confused woman looked up at me with horror. I sat down next to her as she was surprisingly calm. I calmly moved my hand over to hers as I placed it in mine.
“Who-... Who are you?”
“Mynameisnotimportantwhothe-“
“Slow down! Jesus Christ...”
“My. Name. Isn’t. Important. Who. Are. You.” She said in a mocking tone.
I let a small smirk creep across my face. ¨Andrew. My name is Andrew.
¨Well, Andrew," she said tensely, ¨I'm Jenna. Now. Why. Am. I. Here.¨
¨Why so tense, sweetheart? Calm down a bit.¨
¨Why so… tense? Did you just say what I think you did?! You kidnapped me, locked me in your trunk, and drove off with me clueless; and on top of that you threw me down stairs. S-T-A-I-R-S.¨
I smirked again and watched her expression change from scared and upset to really ticked off. She was… intriguing. ¨To be completely honest, I have no idea why I did what I did. I wasn't awake even the slightest bit. I completely blacked out." I got up and paced next to the bed while she kept her eyes on me. ¨Like what you see, babe?¨ I said with yet again another smirk, ¨I mean I would stare at me too if it wasn't for the fact that I AM me.¨ She gave me a disgusted glare and slumped over. ¨Why in the Hells below would you think I would stare at you? I'm not that low.¨ I frowned in disappointment and pouted. ¨Awe, don't sound so cruel.¨
    She layed back down and heaved a long sigh. I stopped pacing and headed to the door with haste. I shut the door and locked it, shoving the key down my pants. ¨Why do you have to put the key down there?¨ She said disgustedly. ¨Because I know you won't go down there.¨
¨You don't know that.¨
¨Oh, so you do have an interest in me? Fascinating. The female species of humans have such complex and vast minds that it's nearly impossible to crack the codes.¨ I reached my hand out and tenderly touched her's so quickly she jumped. I could tell she didn't trust me, but I didn't really care. She was… gorgeous.
Wait… Do I like her?... Oh Lucifer I can't like her. My victim. No no no… This can't be happening. But.. It is.. She's so pretty and tender and soft… I just can't help myself…  I thought to myself in confusion. I got up and reached into my pants, pulling out the key. I saw her from within the corner of my eye shift a bit. I looked back and raised my hand shaking my finger back and forth. ¨No no no, dear. Don't get any funny ideas.¨ She glared at me and sat back down, crossing her arms slightly. I threw my head back and chuckled. ¨I see we've got a trouble maker here. Going to make things difficult, eh? I see." She hissed and closed her eyes. I made my way over to my drawer which I kept a rope in. (I had been thinking about suicide for awhile, not really a big deal.) I walked over and took her wrist within my hand, I hastily tied the rope around her wrist as she squirmed. I took the other end of the rope and tied it around one of the bed posts so tight I swear it almost broke the wood. I then turned and walked out, making sure to lock the door behind me. I trudged down the hallway to the bathroom where my friend and some random being lay passed out (dead, perhaps? I didn't know.) in the bathtub. I picked up the unknown lad and slung him over my shoulder. Geez this guy is a heavy thing, I thought to myself in agony. I walked outside and threw him down without care and headed towards my garage where my shovel lay. ¨Where am I even going to bury him?!¨ I groaned aloud. I turned and looked down at the ground below me as I sighed. ¨No, that just won't do." I looked up and then realized that I lived out in the country. The c-o-u-n-t-r-y. Where ¨nothing bad ever happened.¨ I smirked and grabbed the beings arm then began dragging him across my yard to the corn field where whomever the farmer is had just planted corn seeds. I began digging a hole as I heard a loud crash come from within my home, it seemed as though the crash came from in my room. I ignored it and went about burying the body. I began to hum a tune (which at the moment escapes my brain) as heaved the body into the hole. I covered it up and made sure it looked like nothing has happen, then turned and moved slowly towards my door as I saw the door fling open and Jenna fly out of it at the speed of light. My heart raced as I questioned what all she saw me doing… I quickly ran after her, second by second picking up the pace.
    ¨Jenna, don't go. I want to take care of you!¨ I yelled after her. ¨Go to the underworld, psychopath!¨ I quickly picked up my pace as I was tailing her, I reached my arms out and tackled her onto the gravel we both ran on. She skid a little bit across the concrete and came to a stop. She opened her mouth as to say something or even scream, but nothing came out. I watched her head drop suddenly as she fell unconscious and furiously dug my nails into her skin. Realizing this would most definitely not help, I released my grasp and stood up, looking around to make sure no one was watching. I fell over and got up again starting to pace back and forth around her, waiting for my strength and balance to regain itself. The second it did I bent over and picked her up, carrying her bridal style back to my house. We had somehow managed to run at least a mile and a half. As she lay in my arms I couldn't help but to look down at her stunning face, although scarred and scraped by the dirt and hard concrete. Maybe my mind did something right for once, I jokingly chuckled to myself. As I approached my house she seemed to get heavier and heavier. I was so exhausted… I walked back up to my room and layed her down. I sighed and looked down at her face. I turned and headed towards my dresser once more, pulling out a syringe full of etorphine and slowly placed it into her tender skin.
¨What now?...¨ I questioned aloud. I had to kill her, my heart dropped. For the short day I knew her, I had somehow managed to grow attached and develop feelings for her. I wanted her to die a quick and painless death. I went over and reached into my drawer, finding a bottle of what looked like arsenic… I opened it and sniffed. Definitely arsenic… It will kill her, inevitably. But will it be painful? I grabbed another syringe and placed a few drops of it within the barrel of it. I wiped my face clean of tears and placed it into her, pushing the contents out within her skin and veins. I went and sat in my closet moping. I shut and locked the door, making sure I couldn't get out and no one could get in with little effort. I tortured myself for days without food and basic necessities of life, hoping to successfully commit suicide.
    My vision has been slowly fading in and out as I am writing these words within my final days of life, throughout the agonizing pain of starvation and deprivation of water or food, I have come to the realization that love cannot be trusted. Love just isn't worth it to me.