Spring
The chattering birds, the buzzing bees, remind me of why I love this place.
With every buzz and tweet, I feel at peace. The spring winds cooling the green lush land, the bright yellow sun shining down, welcoming all to its wonderful glow. I remember briefly the hustle and bustle of my past life. I remember the constant horns and lights, the rush to and fro, and wonder why we ever chose that life, over this.
This. The great, lush woods behind us, the warm sunrays, the smell of spring rain after a pleasant thunderstorm, the sound of the frogs croaking in the still night.
Home. Home? That word perplexes me. What am I but a quick and naïve child? I have no idea of home, but I am home. What is home, but a place of security in this large and impatient world?
I decide to take a midday walk; to admire the birds, study the flowers, to enjoy this bright day.
As I walk, I see two scenes…to the right, a pleasant, cheery, bright and flowery spring afternoon; to the left, a drearily grey dawn, foggy, the damp leaves underfoot squishing under the trampling feet of man. As I compare the two scenes, one difference comes quickly; I enjoy the dreary grey, the fallen trees, the subtly pleasant dystopian attitude of the setting, but wish to enjoy the bright and cheery afternoon and its resonating positive energies.
I stand in awe. Two worlds, one dreary, one bright. As I look further into the fog of the grey scene, I see one sole figure. It looks around, as if it’s trying to find someone or something. I call out. “Hello!” The figure sees me, and takes off in the opposite direction, running deeper into the fog. One part of me wants to go after him, to try and find what he’s looking for. Another part wishes to just leave, go back and forget this. I close my eyes, and take one step, into whatever I step into.
It’s the step that gives me the courage to take ten, to take fifty, to take as many as I need. I run.
Looking back now, why was I running? Was I looking for an escape? Adventure? Was I being a Good Samaritan or was I looking to just win? Win? Yes. Win. To say, “Haha, I caught you!” That’s what fueled it, along with the excitement of the chase. What I perceived as sheer curiosity was truly and wholeheartedly the temptation of victory.
I ran. The figure ran. I got closer, but he went farther. The chase. He slowed down, I sped up, but to no avail. Just as I was about to keel over, he stops abruptly. I approach, slowly at first. “H-hello?” The figure whips around. “Get away.” As I steadily approach the person, I see the cliff edge behind him. “I’m not going to hurt you. What are you looking for?” The person backs up. “I said, GET AWAY!” As the person backs up, he slips, and grabs the cliff edge. “Help!” I run to the cliff edge, and grab his hand. “Okay, I’ll try and pull you up.” I pull, and the person stands after regaining his footing on the cliff top. As he brushes himself off, he grabs my hand. “Go. Away.” With that, he swings me around, and pushes me off the cliff.
Falling is not as abrupt or as relaxed as it is depicted. It’s at its own pace. I fall, and as I look around, I see the swirling cherry blossoms flutter around me, and I think of the cheery setting I declined. The bright, warm sun. The gentle breeze. I feel tense at those thoughts, since I know that normally, people enjoy those settings. I’m not normal. Normal. The thought of being on the outside is enough to make one cringe. Not me. I’ve always relished the idea of being isolated, away from others. I’m not normal. That now sounds like a mantra, something to be celebrated. I’m. Not. Normal.
The cherry blossoms twirl above, below, and around me. I turn and look towards the ground, and see a lake. I stretch my arms over my head and brace myself.