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Recipe for getting along with my mother
Ingredients
Lifetime of patience
Truckload of calm
Happy sounding voice
Pocketful of mindreading pills
Flurry of perseverance
Galaxy of forgiveness
Sprinkle of love
Streak of agreeing
Season of changing
Bin of happy pills
Directions
Take a happy pill and slip one in my mother’s drink
Also take some of your calm
Talk to her using your happy sounding voice
Agree with whatever she says
Change yourself to what she wants you to be
When that doesn’t work, use your patience so you don’t get frustrated
When she wants you to read her mind, take one of your handy mindreading pills
Use your perseverance when you still can’t get along with her in order to keep moving forward
If the happy pills aren’t strong enough to handle my mother, use your galaxy of forgiveness so you don’t become angry
Lastly, use your sprinkle of love because you know you should love her despite her difficult nature
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