Breaking News, in our own Florin, the royal wedding was crashed in the name of true love. Prince Humperdink was then strangled by the bandits, who made off with the princess on stolen horses. Rumor has it that one of the bandits was Buttercup’s true love. Tragically, it was the Dread Pirate Roberts that stole away our future Queen today. Rumor has it that Roberts was Buttercup’s beau while he stayed on-land for some time. Sources also identify Indigo Montoya, an apparent alias of Roberts, as the man that attacked Prince Humperdink. Montoya and Roberts were accompanied by another person, just one other. His identity is yet to be revealed, but palace guards described him as a “tall man with flames coming out of his eyes, possessed!”.

This tall figure was Montoya’s and Roberts’ entrance into the palace, for after the gates were opened, he was never seen again. Once in the palace, the rogue pair slipped unseen into Buttercup and Humperdink’s room, stole the bride, tied up the Prince, and slipped away; with the dark night sky on their side. The Prince’s stance on the Pirate’s attack on Florin is yet to be released, as he is currently recovering from strangulation, and of course, the understandable emotional distress that comes with losing one’s bride.