A nail was hammered into one hand and then a nail into the other. Then one nail into both of my feet. Each nail burrowed into the cross of wood at my back. My arms were spread far like a bird ready to soar, my legs crossed and straight, ready to dive into the sea. I wasn't supposed to be hanging here; I didn’t even know the others that were already nailed. I had simply been traveling through the countryside and smelled the cooking of a band of brothers and thought to join them. Next thing I know I am raised here at the stake to die for nothing. When they were prosecuting the man who was last to be raised, he testified for me saying I was not connected with them, but the Romans did not risk it. They could not risk letting a disciple escape who may run to convert others to his heretic ways. Apparently this man had powers, but he did not make a show of them so even I doubted that those claims were true. He was a man just like you and me. The only thing of note was a gaze that seemed to pierce through every façade you had. He looked beyond my skin when he spoke about me and made me feel as if he knew who I truly was. He saw me not as some wayfaring stranger but as a brother, a friend, and a son.
During his interrogation the man named Pontius Pilate asked one last time, "If you're his son then show it, help me believe and I will command this empire to believe in your father. If only you just show it. If you are no son of your father then rescind your heathen ways and denounce yourself to those that follow you. Renounce your claim as the King of the Jews." He didn't use the power he was claimed to have, nor did he denounce his claim to his supposed father. He did however look at me, at my hands, into my eyes, and then into my mind. In his eyes there seemed to be hope, for what I don't know, humanity, my soul, his soul. I don't know. Finally he answered, his eyes still on me as he said,
"You ask me to denounce my religion and expect me to take one established among the rest, but my religion is not recognized because it is unobservable to anyone but the lost and the broken. To enter the Kingdom of Man, you must love everything and everyone. Love everything and everyone and you will enter the Kingdom of Man. Love with agape: The unconditional love that ties everything together. It is faith based love that is not provable only believable. Eros: the personal and physical attraction between two people. Storge: the love between parent and child. Philia: the love between humans. "
The crowds reacted fiercely to this but I was puzzled. I had expected him to spit the usual prophecies of death and destruction to those who sin just as any follower of his father would. Was this why the leaders of the Jews wanted him dead, because of his radical behavior? Instead this man talked only about love. The sun beat fiercely as the day grew strong; the man turned his cheek, and continued,
There is a problem. The problem is that religions don't connect. They have conflicts between each other because they are interpretations from different people, and they ask the wrong things of people. They tell you not to sin. They tell you not to accept others for their different interpretations, but they don't really tell you what you must do. They tell you that as long as you don't do these things you will get into heaven or as long as you keep your head down and hide from your Gods, Jupiter and Venus; you will live a safe life. But this is not so, you must learn to love.
A piece of rotten fruit was tossed from the crowd and stained my tattered clothes, but it made me think. He was right. There was nothing to tell the mob not to hate me, and there was nothing that made them stop to understand me. My thoughts were interrupted when he started to directly speak to me. I shrank into my body as all eyes fell on me. He asked me “You, my brother, my friend, my son, do you love?” My eyes wavered and faded in and out of focus on him and the air became suddenly silent as if it were only him and me. I responded “well I… I don't know, I guess so.” The sun grew more intense upon my face. He then asked “Why do you think God created man?” My skin became warm and I replied “for entertainment I guess.” The direct gaze ended and he looked back at the crowds and his prosecutor.

The point of religion is to establish what purpose God has given us. Spiritually this life is for our development so that when we die we can go to heaven. If we don't learn to accept love unconditionally, then we fail the test and death becomes death. God created Adam and Eve, who were perfect. They loved. They lived carefree lives, and they believed in him. However, God wasn't pleased for he wanted people who could think for themselves. So he gave humans free-will, sent them out into a world of survival, and removed his presence from their lives. The world became a stepping stone to the Garden of Eden, to the Kingdom of God, a place where humans that chose to accept love of their own free will end up. For those who denied love there is no eternity of hell. There is no purgatory. It is simply the end. On your deathbed you may say you suddenly love, but my father will know. I will know. The spirit of love will know. To test whether you love enough ask yourself, if I spent an eternity like Job? If I spent an eternity with nothing but pain and suffering would I still love?
He once again directed everyone's attention to me and asked me what my greatest hardship was and I said my family was raped and killed when I was off fighting for the Roman Empire. He responded,
I tell you this, do not use that as an excuse not to love for at all levels there are obstacles that all must overcome in order to love. At all levels there are experiences of abuse, anxiety, betrayal, death, sickness, hunger, poverty, cold, and homelessness. Some experience more than others, but nonetheless you must love everything and everyone unconditional. A slave whipped by a master must overcome the obstacle of resentment and hatred he will feel towards the master and replace it with Philia, the love for one’s brother. Each time the Master's Cat 'O Nines strikes the slave's back, he is striking Philia and that is the internal wound the master shall have bleeding into his life. Whether you believe in Idols, Gods, or one God, or nothing at all, there is one thing that you must believe in and it must trump all other convictions. Love must conquer all emotion. Love must dominate all action. Love must be the ending of each nerve. You, my friends, my brothers, my sons, you must do this and I promise you a life of eternity.
A Jewish Priest cried out, "Gag him. He has had his chance to renounce his claims and heresy. Crucify him." This inspired the crowds and they now created a rhythm of anger and resentment. “Crucify them, crucify them, crucify them” they resounded. The thunder in their voices continued as my mind rattled with questions. The man who once spoke so nobly was struck to the ground and dragged across the burning sand and rock with only a loincloth for protection. His face winced. It shuddered. His eyes swelled with tears and they looked upon me with that same hope as before. His voice popped into my mind.
You must love unconditional.
I somehow heard his voice through the crowd’s omnipotent chanting even though the man was gagged. As if he could communicate with me without even needing words. I didn't understand it completely but I asked in my mind, “How can I just learn to love?” I then heard his voice once again. It seemed to create a blanket over the sound of the crowds, making them only a soft murmur. His voice said,
It is something you must accept in your heart and mind. Ask yourself these four questions. What is the truth? What is fair to all concerned? What builds goodwill and better friendships? What is beneficial to all concerned? You will pass through the gates when your answer is everything you say, everything you do, and everything you think. Good luck my friend, my brother, my son. I cannot help you with this as this is something you must find out for yourself.
My mind raced as my heart beat faster. I felt light headed as I realized the rush of blood was speeding up my death as the nails drained blood from my body, saturated the wood, and dripped to create mud in the dirt and sand. Slow, breathe, there is time, I closed my eyes and thought. The first question; what is the truth?
The truth is the correct answer to a question. So what is the question? My thoughts ran in circles, “What is the truth?” Except how would I know the answer if I don't even know the question. I guess that is the most fundamental question of all. What is the point of life, my purpose on earth, the meaning of existence? That's simple, it’s merely to live. But everyone does that, so I must look to the next step of our existence. I suppose this one is to dominate the earth, to be the stewards of the world. Wait but how does one go about that? Do you replenish the earth or do you rape it? That’s not just a question for the world but of its people. Do you help the people or destroy others. Maybe this is what he meant, the truth is to love. People deny this truth and do not accept it into their hearts.
Now I thought about the next question. What is fair to all concerned? Love? What builds goodwill and better friendships? Love? What is beneficial to all concerned? Love? It seemed that the answer to all these questions is love. I heard his voice once again,
You see, now let your answer become everything you say, everything you do, and everything you think. Let go of your fear. Let go of your vengeance. And let go of your hate.
I calmed myself further and went to every part of my mind and searched for the hate and vengeance. I found the memory of coming home to a quiet house with my family dead and desecrated. I heard his voice again,
Forgive but don't forget because you cannot forget things nor should you for they are what make you who you are. How you respond to that memory is what ultimately matters most. You must let love become the way you respond.
I looked up and found that my vision was splotchy and blurry. My life was almost at its end and I could feel it. Now it was time to battle the only thing I had left to fear, the fear of an early end. I suddenly began to question what I was doing. Death is death and there is no heaven like this man talks of. So why was I trying to love unconditionally like he told me to when there was no point in it. His voice responded to this,
You must do this because even if you don't believe me and my promise of eternal life at least you will be happy when you die. You will be happy because you will have fulfilled your purpose in life. Your life will have had meaning. No one here can say the same. True happiness only comes from aligning your life to this higher purpose.
I thought about this and I realized he was right. Right now I was the happiest I had ever been. I almost felt like I was departing from my body and was becoming instead a part of something else. I finally heard his voice one last time,
What you feel is the spirit of Love, the Holy Spirit that joins everything, another word for it is Agape. Continue to accept it, let it fill your body, your mind, and your heart.
The feeling he spoke of continued to swell up within me as the love grew and I closed my eyes one last time and it was good.