They say time will heal the wound, but Louis has been dead for six months now and yet my heart still aches nevertheless. To tell you the truth, I do not think the pain will ever stop.
I also think that they should stop saying the whole thing about time, but I guess they only did that to give you some hope; that somehow you will recover from all the pain and tortures induce by the loss, and silently pray that someday you will.
They’re wrong, you know.
So yes, someday and somehow in the indistinct future, you will stop grieving and just get on with what’s left in your life but the pain still lies there, and like a cancer patient that went in remission, only waiting to relapse again.
You’ll never fully recover. You just have to learn to live with it. And that’s what I've been doing all along.
If you ask me what acute lymphatic leukemia is a few years ago, I would probably gawp at you and made a fool of myself despite being a pre-med student. But ever since Louis was diagnosed with that disease, I was an expert on that particular matter. I knew the whole thing about it; from the causes, the symptoms and all the way to the treatments needed. I also knew that the treatments were only to help prolong the patient’s life, but not save them. There is no cure for this disease, and to know this sent a chill down my spine.
Louis was going to die, sooner or later. And there was nothing I could do about it.