Memories


As I walk through the purple lavender filled forest, all I could hear were birds chirping loudly and humming calmly. All I could do was keep taking in the dazzling smell of fresh violet flowers. It was peaceful, and for miles I could see the sun glistening. The sun peeked brightly through the trees, and created large scary, shadows. The shimming sun peered down on me as it shined through the bulky pine trees. As I sat down to take in the moment, a butterfly appeared from the trees around me, it fluttered close to me, with its large vibrant wings flapping quickly. It was so quiet, and I decided it was the perfect moment in time for me to lay my backpack down, and pull out my diary.
It was a beautiful but sad afternoon, filled with tears of sadness dripping down the side of my face. Scribbling into my diary, in handwriting that only I could read, I described in detail everything I saw around me. After I finished writing, I looked back into pages of my journal, and re-read my old journal entries. Today was the day my mother died two years ago. She passed away from cancer on November 2nd. As the years go by, I will always remember two days of the year, November 2nd and December 24th. December 24th is the birthday that we’ve shared for so many years, and I will never forget one of those precious moments. Each and every year my birthday becomes more depressing, because it’s just one more day I can’t celebrate it with my mom.
I remember sitting in the hospital room gripping my mom’s thin, pale white hand with strength I didn’t know I ever had. One day I walked in and I said as cheerfully as I could “Hi Mom, I brought your favorite flowers!” They were the purple flowers with the scent of fresh lavender from the forest back behind our house. We visited the meadow almost every weekend to have a family picnic, and rarely did we miss the family get together. My mother loved going there; if she could, she would sit there all day long taking in the bright sun, and the inviting smells. I remembered my mom replying back to me in a sweet soft voice, “Mia thank you so much you are the kindness daughter, and I love you with all my heart.” That was the last sentence I ever heard my mother say to me.
My little sister Jane was just three years old when our mother passed away. At the age of three she still didn’t understand what had happened to our mother, now that she is older she has a better understanding. She’s always depressed and just stays in her room, cooped up like a chicken. Every day when I walk into Jane’s room to see how she is doing, I just see her sitting down staring off into the middle of nowhere, looking like she had just seen a ghost. When I talk to her, her face is pasty white, and she looks gloomy. Now my house is boring because it’s just my dad who’s never home because he’s too busy with work. Then there is Jane who is shy and never comes out of her room, and then there is me. I’m 14 years old, and I’m always taking care of my little sister since my dad, Bill, never takes the time to help out my little sis. He always says, “I’m too caught up with work,” but I don’t really think he is. I think he just doesn’t know how to take care of his own children now that my mom isn’t alive any more. Even when he has work off he just sits there on the couch watching his shows all day long.
I hate how he doesn’t even spend the time to make us a home cooked dinner; I always have to make a frozen meal for my sister and me to share. We are always tired of having them five times a week. Only on the weekends my dad will actually take the time to make us a high-quality dinner, with a dessert. It gets annoying not having our weekly family dinners anymore, no more setting up the table with our festival place mats, and decorating the table with the nice bowls and matching plates.
Days went by; nothing was different than any regular day. I did my normal routine, woke up, ate, got ready, and then went to the bus stop with Jenna. As weeks went by nothing changed, however it was becoming close to my birthday.
Today is my 15th Birthday, I woke feeling like it was going to be a new day, a day filled with happiness, and I could sense something special was going to happen. Although it was Monday and I had school, I could just feel in my heart today was going to be different. I felt like my mom was speaking to me saying “it’s going to be better honey.”
I jumped off the big, yellow, roaring bus. I was filled with excitement, I didn’t know what was going to come, but I could feel something in my heart. Jenna, my best friend rides the bus home with me every day; we get on together and off together. I’ve known her since we were in 1st grade, even though we’ve been neighbors our entire life. I remember looking at her; she had a confused look on her face. I asked her “What’s wrong Jenna?” and she replied back “I’m fine I just don’t remember seeing you this excited about something since…since before your mom died.” All I said back to her was “Something good is about to happen I just feel it.” Jenna still has that weird look on her face, the one that makes me think I’m crazy. I just kept thinking to myself I’m fine just calm down.
We reached the top of the large hill, at the top sat our two big houses lonely and silently. Jenna and I lived in the country, we love being out here it’s quiet and peaceful. One of our favorite things to do is go out on our back porch, and watch the deer prance back and forth, in and out of the trees.
When it was time to go our separate ways, we both approached our door steps. Every day we both glance back at each other, making sure we’re okay and are safe. Today I was very thrilled to go home because something was going to change. I approached my way through the door, as it flung wide opened, there stood my dad greeting me at the door; which he hasn’t done since my mom was alive. He looked straight at me, his head tilted down, and his eyes opened widely, as he looked towards me he said in a cheery voice, “How was your day at school?” I stood there frozen, I was shocked, did my dad really just say that, or I’m I dreaming? He just kept staring at me, as I was still standing there in disbelief. It kept playing through my head over and over again like an old record sound track. As I realized it was real, I answered in the happiest voice “It was really good, but I’m glad I’m home now with you, and Jane.”
After finishing talking to my dad I smelled something I haven’t for a long time, it was my mom’s homemade spaghetti. It’s my most desired meal, has been and always will be, until the day I step foot off earth. I walked in the dining room there laid a set table with my mom’s special dining set. I stood there staring, with my jaw dropped wide open. I never would have believed this would happen, but it was really true maybe my dad has changed. But what made him change? Why is he acting so different? I didn’t know why this was happening to me, why did he decide to be different today out of all days? I kept thinking is this only because it’s my birthday or has my dad really changed?
I was surprised today, my dad actually noticed me, and I was blown away. I knew today wasn’t like any average day, but I guess this wasn’t the only good thing that was going to happen.
My dad called me into the living room shouting from down stairs. I stumbled down the deep, tapered and narrow stair case, in a hurry. When I reached the end of the stairs, my dad welcomed me, with a face I’ve never seen him have. He looked depressed, excited, and sad all at the same time. We both sat on the coach, silently staring at each other; my dad took in a deep gasp, and said “I have something very important to show, and tell you. I took in a big breath, and replied back, “What!”
He pulled out a brown crusted, rusted, and square box, inside was a mystery for me to find out. It looked interesting, and appealing, it really caught my eye. I was speechless; I didn’t know what it was, or what I was supposed to do with? But my dad told me to unlock it, so I did, taking a large breath in, and Bam, there was a box filled with arranged letters all over. I pick up one, and ready on the outside December 25th 2055, which was today! I pull out the note, and read, “Dear Mia I’m writing these letters to help you throughout life, and I’m already assuming I’m not alive by now. I’m sorry I’m not here with your sister and you to help guide you through life. I miss you terribly, and hope you are getting along with Jane. I need you to help her, and I hope you’re helping your father out. I know he is going through a rough time, as I’m sure both Jane and you are. I miss you guys to the moon and back, and can’t explain how sorry I’m not here. Love you so much, and tell Jane hi for me.”

Lots of Love~ Mom
By the time I finished reading my face was dripping with tears. Not only were there tears of sadness, there were tears of joy. I was happy to know I still had a part of my mom left. As I was carefully putting back the letter into the envelope, I read the outside of another, there again I saw my Birthday December 24th, but the year was 2056. I realized my mom wrote one for each of my birthdays, and wanted me to read them each year. She was a very nice woman and she always helped out others. She enjoyed working with the community by giving her time to help clean up, and she loved teaching kids. I will never forget the days we spent together picnicking back behind our house in the lavender forest, it made the best memories.