I’m just a regular 15-year-old girl. I go to a normal highschool, I have normal friends, I have a regular part time job at Starbucks, and I have a normal family. I’m all around normal. How this happened, I have no clue; but I guess it’s time for people to hear my story. The real story.

“Cassidy Walker, you’d better hurry up.…” My friend, Emily, demanded.

I rolled my eyes, closed my locker, and replied, “I’m coming, calm down.”

“Well, go quicker! We can’t be late to this party tonight.” She nagged, flicking her chestnut hair over her shoulder.

I just shook my head and walked with her towards the front doors of the school. Emily was dragging me along to some huge party tonight that was being hosted by Ryan Stevens, who is known for having the best, most massive parties out of anyone at Witherson Park High School. Em had the privilege of being invited, and I had the joy of accompanying her. I’m not one for the party scene, honestly. I’d much rather stay home and listen to music than go to some loud, crowded house with lights flashing so bright they blind you; but I decided I’d suck it up and go since she was so excited about it. She’s been droning on and on about it for the past week. In fact, she was still blabbering about it now.

“Nicole’s gonna be there, and Stacey, and Josh, and it’s just gonna be so much fun! Aren’t you just so pumped?!”

I smiled and said, “I mean, I guess it’s better than sitting at home on Tumblr and watching YouTube videos all night.

She glared at me with her green eyes, but couldn’t help but laugh. “Whatever. Well, I’ll be at your house at 6:30 to pick you up, kay?”

“Sounds good.”

Just as my alarm on my phone went off at 6:30 to tell me to be ready, I heard the doorbell. I took one last glance in the mirror to look at my reflection. I had straightened my naturally wavy black hair, and rimmed my blue eyes with eyeliner and mascara. I heard some impatient bangs on my door and scurried down the stairs to answer it. I opened the door to an overly-giddy Emily.

“You ready?” She asked, her voice raising an octave.

“As ready as I’ll ever be.” I responded grinning, closing my door and locking it. She hooked her arm with mine and practically skipped to her car.

When we arrived, I could hear pulsing pop music and could see bright, multi-colored, seizure-inflicting lights flashing through the window. Before Em and I even knocked on the door, a grinning Ryan Stevens had already flung it wide open.

“Hey.” He greeted us. I thought Emily might faint.

“H-hey.” She stuttered.

“Well, come in.” Ryan opened the door wider to let us in. It felt as if my eardrums were about to explode.

“Isn’t this awesome?!” Emily squealed over the loud voices and blasting music.

I rolled my eyes, “It’s alright.”

Just then a booming voice that I guessed was Ryan’s replace the music, “You guys having a good time?!”

It sounded like I was at a One Direction concert, the response was so loud. The loud voice was replaced by the music again after a few minutes of him yelling at the crowd.

“Hey, a few other people and I are going up to the roof. I was wondering if you wanted to come.” I jumped when I heard Ryan come up behind us.

“Sure, I’d love to come!” Emily gushed. I started walking with her, but Ryan stopped me.

“Wait, did I invite you?” He looked puzzled.

My face got red, but hopefully nobody noticed because of the flashing lights. “Uh, well, n-”

Em saved me, “No, but I did.”

“Oh. Well if you’re gonna stay, I’m gonna need you to do something for me.”

I looked at him with skepticism. What could I do that he couldn’t?

“Well… What is it?”

He looked around as if to make sure nobody could hear him, which pretty useless since I could barely even hear my own thoughts.

“See that guy over there?” Ryan pointed to a tall, lanky black haired guy standing with a skinny, bottle-blonde girl.

“The one with the blonde chick?” I clarified.

“Yeah, him. Well, that’s Jack Merrick. He stole my girlfriend. That’s the girl he’s with. I want you to put this,” He pulled out a bag with a flat, circular, white pill-like item inside, “Into his drink.”

I was appalled that he thought I would do such a thing.

I guess he saw my face, because he rolled his eyes and said, “Don’t worry, it won’t hurt him. It’ll just make him… A bit disoriented…” He looked a bit unsure.

“I’m still not sure if I-” I was cut off by Emily.

“She’ll do it.” She was smiling like a madwoman and looked at me with a face that said ‘You’d better do this.’ Ryan thrust the pill at me and I took it unwillingly.

“How the heck am I supposed to put it in his drink if he’s holding it?” I asked, trying to find excuses.

“Do it when he goes to the bathroom or something.” He replied, as if to say ‘Duh.’

As if on cue, I saw Jack put down his cup and walk away. I took a deep breath and walked towards the table his drink was sitting on, my legs feeling like they were embedded in cement. I looked down at the fizzy, brown, liquid; presumably coke or Pepsi. It made me sick just thinking of what I was about to do. I slowly took the pill out of the bag with shaking hands. One part of my brain was telling me to do it; I mean Ryan said it was fine. The other part knew something was wrong about this. I made a spur-of-the-moment decision and dropped the pill into the soda. I watched in disbelief in myself as I saw it dissolve almost instantly. I quickly scampered back to Emily and Ryan and showed him the empty bag. He smiled silently in response and put the empty bag in his coat pocket.

A few hours later, Em and I were driving home, and I had already forgotten about what I had done to Jack’s drink.

“Aren’t you glad I dragged you to that amazing party?” She asked, grinning to herself.

My face broke into a huge smile, “Yeah, it was awesome! A lot more fun than I expected.”

“We’ll have to do it again sometime.”

“Agreed.”

The next morning, I woke up and leisurely went downstairs to get breakfast. I turned on the TV and flipped to the news for some background noise. I hate silence. That was when I heard it. I froze.

“Local teenaged boy found dead last night after attending a party. The name and cause of death is yet to be disclosed.” I heard the anchor womans’ voice say.
It can’t be Jack… Can it? No… I’m not a murderer! Ryan wouldn’t lie like that, would he? He isn’t a criminal! Just then my phone rang. I jumped six feet into the air. I didn’t recognize the number. What if it was the police?
“Hello?” I answered shakily.
“Are you watching the news?” I heard the angry voice on the other line say. It sounded like Ryan.
“Y-yes.”
“You actually DID it?! I didn’t expect you to actually go through with it! Are you crazy?! You could go to JAIL for this!!!!”
I was hyperventilating. This can’t be happening. “Bu-but y-you said…”
“Yeah, I did. I lied. I didn’t think you were that STUPID!”
I was on the verge of tears. “I jus- I can’t… What do we do?!”
“WE? No. This is all you.”
“WHAT?! But YOU’RE the one who told me to do it!!!”
“Yeah, maybe, but I didn’t expect you to listen to me!” The line was silent for a few seconds before I heard him hiss, “The cops are here. I gotta go. If you think I’m turning myself in, you’re wrong.”
I sunk to the floor and put my face in my hands. This can’t happen. It can’t. I hung up the phone, turned it off, and tossed it onto the couch. What’s going to happen to happen to me? I could go to jail. FOR LIFE!
Just then I heard a knock at the door. My parents were at work, so I got up from my spot on the floor and slowly walked toward the door. I reached for the handle with shaking hands. Please don’t be the cops… I swung the door open and, not to my surprise, I had three men in uniform standing there. The color drained from my face.
“Hello Miss…” He looked at a piece of paper on his clipboard, which I’m guessing he had my name on. “Miss Walker. We have a few questions about Jack Merrick’s death, if you don’t mind. May we come in?”
I looked at the officers numbly and silently opened the door wider to let them in. They nodded at me and walked into my house.
“Are your parents home?” One of them asked.
I simply shook my head.
They each took seats at my kitchen counter. The one who first talked to me pointed to a chair.
“Sit down.” When he saw me hesitate, he chuckled and said “It’s fine, we’re just going to ask some questions. We’re not accusing you of anything.”
I walked over to the open chair and sat.
The officer took a look at his clipboard and starting asking me questions.
“So, you were at Ryan Stevens’ party last night?”
I nodded.
“Were you with anyone?”
“Yes, my friend Emily Olson.”
He wrote something down on his clipboard.
“Okay, now did you socialize with Jack at all during this party? Talk to him, bump into him, even anything as much as wave at him?”
“No, but I did mess with his drink.” Right after that slipped out, I covered my mouth with my hand. How could I be so STUPID?!
They all looked at me in shock.
“What exactly do you mean by that, Cassidy?”
That was it. I started bawling and told them everything. They looked so surprised.
“So… Let me get this straight, he told you to put something in his drink, told you it wouldn’t do anything so you did it, it ended up killing someone, and now he says that you shouldn’t believe him?”
I nodded numbly. All of the cops looked at at each other.
“Um… Okay, well… We still need to take you down to the station. I mean, you DID kill someone, even if you claim it was on accident.”
I can’t believe I’m going to JAIL. I got up from my seat and followed one of the cops to their car.
When we got to the station, my parents were already there. I guess one of the other officers had called them. They had tears in their eyes. When they saw me, they ran towards me and engulfed me in a hug.
“Why would you do this, Cassidy? Did it sound like a good idea?” My mother asked, her voice cracking.
I didn’t know how to respond. I just stared at her.


ONE YEAR LATER



Well, I’m still in jail. And I will be, for the next 14 years. Why, you ask? I mean, it wasn’t my fault, was it? Well, yes and no. Shouldn’t Ryan be in jail, too? Why does he get to have a clean record, continue school, go to parties, eventually go to college, when I have to stay in this dumpy cell for my whole teenaged and 20-year-old life? Well, I found out a few months after I was put in jail by hearing officers talking that, since Ryan’s family is very rich, he got out of jail time. Of course they couldn’t just slap me on the wrist and give me a warning, no, they HAD to drop me here. I guess I’ll be here for a while. With just this journal to keep me company.