Jess’s alarm started blaring on her side table, jolting her from her dreams. She glanced at her clock, which read 5:30 am. She groaned and rolled over, hoping she was still dreaming and didn't really have to get up. Being an intern meant her day started very early, way before anyone in their right mind would be up. She struggled to pull her sore, exhausted body out of her warm, comfortable bed and stumbled to the bathroom. This job was taking a toll on her. She felt drained all the time, no matter what she was doing. She didn’t understand why she felt this way. After all she had always wanted to be a surgical intern at one of the best hospitals in the nation. But that dream had been clouded by the harsh reality of how hard the job really was. All she thought about now how much easier another, less stressful field could be. But for now she was still a surgeon and it was time to work. Trying to put all thoughts of giving up behind her, Jess went to try to survive the insanity of her job.
The day was jam packed and full of stress, but that wasn't anything new. She had grown used to the hospital’s constant buzz of motion and quiet panic. She was constantly running around from floor to floor, from patient to patient, trying to make sure they all stayed alive. By the time lunch rolled around, her feet hurt like she had just run two marathons. She collapsed next to Daniel at the lunch table, sinking into the chair, feeling the relief of being able to sit down.
“How has your day been going Jess?” asked Daniel in his concerned fatherly tone. He had definitely noticed the defeated look on her face.
“It’s going alright. A woman came in with appendicitis, and I got to scrub in on the surgery which was fun, I guess,” Jess replied, trying to sound enthusiastic.
“What's wrong?” Daniel started to say, but his pager beeped, ripping him from the conversation. “Sorry, I gotta go, Mr. Jenkins is coding.” And he dashed off leaving Jess sitting alone, once again thinking about how much easier a different field would be. But then her pager went off, and she was on the move again, unable to think about anything except the task at hand.
She sprinted like an Olympic runner to the room of one of her favorite patients, to find him throwing up blood, which is never good. She reacted quickly, never stopping to panic like many other interns do. She paged her attending, Dr. Kelly Sand, and together they rushed the patient to surgery.
Hours later, they emerged from the operating room, like athletes after an intense game.
Dr. Sand turned to look at Jess and said, “You did a great job in there. You reacted like any seasoned surgeon and saved that patient. Some day you’ll be an amazing doctor.”
“Thanks Dr. Sand. I really appreciate that, but I’m not so sure you’re right. I don’t think I can handle this job. It’s too stressful and I can’t deal with it,” Jess replied, avoiding eye contact so she wouldn't have to see the disappointment on Dr. Sand’s face.
“Let me ask you something Jess. What is the one thing you can’t go a day without thinking about? What makes you really smile?”
“Well, I guess I can’t go a day without thinking about surgery and how one day I hope to be a groundbreaking surgeon. It makes me smile thinking about that dream, and having it come true would make me the happiest person in the world.” Jess said, smiling to herself.
Dr. Sand looked into Jess’s eyes and said, “Well then I have one thing to say, never give up on something you can’t go a day without thinking about.”