Adam sat, staring at the envelope in his hands. Around him his apartment floor was clean but cluttered, scattered with stray t-shirts and shoes. It felt lived in, just the way he liked it. He sat on the old leather couch from his childhood home, contemplating the letter that could bring him so far from it.

About six months before, Adam had applied for an internship type program that allowed young aspiring politicians from around the world to live in Washington, D.C. for a year and experience American politics. At the end of the year a few of the students usually got job offers from the men they had worked with. From what his professor told him it was an amazing opportunity, a perfect way to transition from university to the real world. He didn’t realize how much he wanted to do it until that moment, when he was holding the letter that could change his life forever. Israel was all he’d ever known, but America was where the real change happened. If he really was going to change the world, or at least the middle east, that would be the place to do it from.

The thought of being there made him giddy, but then his sister’s face entered his mind. She would feel betrayed. Ever since her twin was killed, along with their father, Adam was all she had. Their mother was there, but not really there. He shook the thoughts out of his head, he was working through a decision he didn’t even know if he had to make yet. He threw the letter onto the coffee table, placing his head in his hands and his elbows on his knees he gathered the strength to face the truth. Part of him wished he didn’t get in, so he wouldn’t have to make that decision. Taking three deep breathes he reached for the letter, and finally opened it.

Dear Adam,

Congradulations! ....

He jumped up, then fell back into the couch. How would he explain this to Lea? She would want him to go, but not really. She didn’t even know he had applied. He called her, asking if she would meet him for lunch, it wasn’t until she laughed that he realized it was already 3 o’clock. He had been sitting there, staring at the letter for nearly three hours. He recovered quickly and told her to meet him at their usual spot. It was a small cafe on a side alley in Tel Aviv. The coffee was good, and it was almost always empty. They had found it years ago and fell in love.

When Adam walked in Lea was already sitting in their booth, with two cups of coffee and a pastry between them. He thought he had played off his mistake, but she must’ve picked up on his mood, baklava was reserved for especially bad days and tough conversations. He sat down, not meeting his sister’s eyes, and prodded the layered pastry in front of him. Though he felt her eyes on him, she did not pry. She knew by now she was better off waiting until he was ready.

Finally, with a sigh, he began to speak, “So, I uhm, applied to go live in the states for a year and - “

She cut him off “I know, I saw the application open on your computer one day when I was over there and looked up the program. It seems legit.”

He felt the blood rush to his face. She knew all along? “Yeah well uh, I got the letter today,” he let his voice trail off. His sister looked at him expectantly, finally he was able to continue. “I got in.”

“Wow! Congratulations!” She sounded excited enough, but below that there was pain, Adam knew. She grabbed his hand from across the table, quieter she affirmed, “Really. That’s awesome.”

Adam knew he wouldn’t believe the answer but he asked the question anyway, “So, you think I should go?”

“Of course you should go! It’s the opportunity of a life time. I would be upset if you didn’t go.” As she said this her voice caught in her throat, and she struggled to hold back the tears that welled in her eyes. It would be hard for her, it would be hard for both of them, and Adam realized this. But he also realized she meant what she said, she would feel worse if she was what held him back.

Since the suicide bombing that took the life of his father and younger sister, he and Lea had been inseparable. He had difficulty trusting anyone else, just the thought of being so far from her, for so long made his stomach churn. But Lea kept conversation light as they sipped their coffee and finished their snack. When it was finally time to part ways, Lea gave her older brother an extra long embrace, standing on her tip toes and wrapping her arms around his neck, the same way she had since they were kids.

Walking home, Adam couldn't shake the knots in his stomach. He idly toyed with the mezuzah necklace his father had gotten him for his bar mitzvah. Everything was so different then. Walking through the city he flipped through his childhood memories; holidays, celebrations, vacations. His family was at the forefront of it all. When he made it back to his apartment he wasn't sure how he had got there.

He struggled to focus on anything but the decision in front of him. He knew how Lea was. She was his biggest supporter, and would hate to hold him back. He found himself sitting on his couch again, lost in his thoughts when his apartment door opened. Apparently Lea’s mental state wasn’t much different than his own. She began talking as soon as she walked in.

“So I’ve been thinking about it and we’ll be apart but not really. International messaging is expensive so obviously we won’t be doing that but there’s skype and kik and the program says you’re off for a month over christmas so you can come home then and that’s like in the middle so really it’ll only be 6 months and then another six months and a six hour time difference is totally manageable.” She took a breath and Adam took the opportunity to interject.

“Lea, you looked up all that in the last four hours?”

She studied her perfectly pedicured toes, before sheepishly handing over the paper in her hand. Adam couldn’t help but let out a chuckle. “You really are amazing.” He shook his head at the skype schedule in front of him.
“I just thought you should know that this really can work. And that a year apart isn’t the end of the world.” She said it all without meeting his eyes.
Adam let out a sigh, “Well then, I guess we better celebrate.”
“I’m way ahead of you.” Lea said, showing him the bottle of red she had been holding behind her back.

They spent the rest of the night passing the bottle between them and discussing the trip. Adam kept coming back to the difficulties, but Lea reminded him that in the end it would be worth it.

Still feeling guilty, but not pushing his sister’s resolve, Adam spent the next couple months getting everything in order for his trip to America. Planning to leave the only place he’d ever known. As the day of his departure drew nearer he felt sick with nerves. No matter how many times Lea told him he was doing the right thing, he still felt like he was abandoning her, and his country as a whole.

He had spent the two days before his departure solely with Lea. It was reserved for packing for the trip, going over their skype schedule, and watching Netflix.

“This. This is what I’m going to miss. Who am I supposed to binge watch with?” It seemed miniscule but it was all Adam could think about.
“No, no, no. You’ll be fine. The time apart will be good,” she reassured him. “I want to have nieces and nephews some day and that can’t happen if I’m the only girl you ever get up the nerve to talk to.”

He turned and punched her, which caused her to laugh even more. “I talk to plenty of girls, just you wait. I’m gonna come home with some beautiful blonde from the states, and then you’ll wish you never mentioned it.” This caused both of them to laugh. Maybe it was the stress leading up to him leaving, or the bottle of wine they had split, but they were feeling silly rather than sad that night. Which Adam was thankful for.

When they said goodbye the next day they did their best to keep in brief. They had decided just a hug and an “I love you” was all that was allowed. They kept to their promise, and stepping onto the plane all Adam could think was, “This is it. No turning back now.” He turned around to get one last look at his sister. She was standing there in a flowered sundress, long messy brown hair falling down past her shoulders, smiling back at him, with tears streaming down her face. A picture of innocence. He would keep that picture with him on his journey to change the world. The same world that had changed him.