"You're never home anyway, so why does it matter?"

"Really? You kidding me right now--"

"I thought--"


"God Laurie!"

"You came home to spend time with me. Not walk the dog, and watch 5 hours of television," she said.

"Damn it Laurie I came-"

"Whatever, have fun at work," she said as she turned her back and walked into her room. He followed.

I could hear them speak through my bedroom walls. The vibrations of the door shook the floor, making one of my unwanted puppy posters, from middle school fall down. My knees touching my forehead, I started to slip behind my bed; holding my breath. I could barely see their wedding picture that I kept on my table covered with soda cans, music sheets, and old gum wrappers. Do you ever stop, I thought to myself. They've been married for 17 years today, and they still couldn't stop bickering.


"Stop. Just stop!" I yelled. There was silence for a couple minutes until they moved their conversation somewhere else where they thought I couldn't hear.

I slowly slid under my blanket. I don't understand, just yesterday there were flowers. I remember my mom was making dinner in the kitchen. I was watching the latest episode of New Girl and my dad walked in from work. My mom's hair was in a messy bun, and she was wearing sweats and had flour on her face. My dad came home sweaty and sluggish, his hair was standing up from dirt, and his plaid shirt was halfway untucked. He went into the kitchen and hugged her from behind, and popped flowers in-front of her face. You could see her beaming from across the room.

What happened to that moment, what happened to the sweetness that was there yesterday? It's like it wasn't even real.






* * *

"Laurie, I was out working to feed you and our children. That's my job, this is yours." The fighting echoed down the hallway.

"I work, I work all day taking care of YOUR children, and I don't sit on my ass watching sports all evening …and what do I get?"

"Well, it doesn't look it."

"I clean up and the kids mess it up again, what am I supposed to do? Clean for sixteen hours straight?" she said.


"You could actually organize. Find places to put this crap instead of stuffing it places."

"How about you do that?" She said.

"I have two jobs. I work all day, walk the dog, take care of the yard and go back to work at night. All I want to do is come home to a clean home and relax a little, it's not too much to ask.

"You are such a typical man. FINE. I'll do all the work! I'll clean, I'll do the dishes, I'll cook, I'll drive the kids everywhere. What the hell, I'll even do your fucking job."

"Laurie, stop. I didn't say--."

"Nooo, cause this is my job! It the only thing I am allowed to do. I'm not allowed to have fun, all I get to do is clean," she said, almost screaming now, as she started throwing the shoes off the closet. I walked into the dining room trying to calm her down.

"Mom, stop, you're taking this too far," I said.

"Laurie, stop overreacting," he said.

"I guess I can't do anything, I can't clean or rest. F*** you, Shane."

I ran into the other room and crouched on the ground. Mascara running down my face, I flipped my hair in front of my eyes making my vision blurry.

"Come here, honey," my dad said. I got up and buried my face into his chest as I let my emotions go.

"Are you ready to go?" he said.

"Yeah, I'm ready.” We got in the car to drive me to my friend Becky's house, it had been planned all day and my mom was supposed to take me but she said she had to clean.

"I don't understand. You guys keep fighting for the most stupid reasons," I said.

"Sometimes couples fight."

"I know but--"

"I know."

"Why can't you guys just let go?"

"Your mom isn't one to let go. She always needs someone to blame."

"But why?"

"Some people are just angry. Your mom has a past she can't let go of, and that's why she gets mad so quickly. She was even mad at me on our wedding day."

"Doesn't she know it affects us too?"

"I know, I know. Sometimes I wonder if staying together this long helped you kids or hurt you."

* * *

"Hey Beck," I looked over at her and Nick who were setting up the keg for the night.

"Hey," they both responded. I walked across the room, and grabbed a red solo cup from the table. "Don't mind if I do," I said.

"I thought you never drank?" Nick snickered.

"I do," I took my first sip; the bitter taste slid down my throat as I took another.






* * *

I watched Becky pull Nick by his forearm out the sliding door, he stumbled behind her.

"Did you touch her?" Becky yelled at Nick pulling him outside the screen door on the porch. Nick looked around. His mouth dropped.

"No..no Becky, I would never--" he slurred as his foot slipped on the stairs of the porch.

"You did, I saw you!"

"No Becky I didn't, I didn't I sa-wear," he stuttered.

"I s--"

"You…you go Beck. Tell him what’s up," I screamed, laying back on the couch, one arm hungover touching the floor. I kept watching Beck yell at Nick, the image was getting blurry and my stomach turned. I remembered the day that I went to visit my dad at work. My mom dropped me off at the garage, and I waved to her from the screen door. I walked into his office and saw him sitting there with a tall, brown haired woman. His hand was on the small of her back, and when he saw me they quickly separated. That's all I remember.

"Stop lying to me," Becky yelled.

I slowly moved my way off the couch, stumbling to the bathroom. I turned the sticky brass doorknob, and swung the door open hitting me on the way back. I puked, aiming for the toilet, as I fell to the hard tile floor, and everything faded away.