The moon lit the night, and Ron shivered under its appeal. He looked up at the stars and thought how bright each distant speck was. So isolated from their warmth and comfort he was. Thousands dotted the sky, each beaming to outshine another, and all had meaning and purpose, lighting up the heavens. Some connected with each other, forming great pictures. The city lights permitted only the brightest to pass its barrier. The honk of a nearby taxi dragged him back to the dirty streets where he lay. A gust of wind sent a shiver up his spine, so he wiped off the filth and looked for an accessible shelter.

The relentless stomping of daily commuters had beaten down the subway stairs on 167th street, and the maintenance crew was scrubbing the station to get it ready for tomorrow. As Ron slowly shuffled down the steps towards a trash can for a snack, using the white tiled walls as a guide, the stench of ammonia assaulted his nostrils and sparked tears. Lifting the lid, Ron cringed at the emptiness in the can, which made his stomach grumble from its own emptiness. The lid plopped back to its spot, and he tromped to another corner to lie down and wait for sleep’s escape.

Ron’s head throbbed from the low monotonous hum of the vacuum and the infrequent trains that passed only to rouse dirt from one place to another without more than three or four passengers to take. After many hours, the crew finished their work, leaving Ron alone. He finally caught the golden hours and used them.


He woke up and stretched. Ron felt around for his wife, but she wasn’t there. He opened his eyes and was paralyzed by the sun. She purposely leaves these shades open, he thought.

“Honey?” he groaned.

“In the kitchen!” She shouted back.
He yawned and let out his tiredness from the night. The cool, fall air was chilling the house and he missed the warmth of the summer. Ron got out of bed and stood tall.

As Ron was walking out the door, a small figure approached him. “Daddy, are you driving me to school?” He looked up at his father.

“Of course Jason. How’s your brother feeling?”

“He’s sick, again.” He rolled his eyes. Jason was holding his favorite teddy bear. He got it on his 4th birthday and always cherished it. He always held it, especially when he was gloomy. Jason carried the bear by the arm, as if he was leading it to where it needs to go.

“Yes, we need to take him to the doctors. We’ll drop you at school on the way there.” Jason nodded. He bounced out of the room, tumbling onto the carpet floor and standing again up to trudge away. Ron walked out of the room and down the hallway to Jimmy’s room.

Jimmy was reading his favorite book The Very Hungry Caterpillar. He read it every day ever since he could read, and before that, his mother read it to him. The book looked so abused, but was strong in spirit. His room was completely filled with toys and random objects. The bed stood in the middle of the room as an island away from it all.

“Hey buddy, how you feeling?” Jimmy glance up.

“I don’t feel so well.” His voice was very scratchy.

“Don’t worry, we’ll see Dr. Carter soon.” Jimmy coughed a few times.

Ron strode over the mountains of toys to his son. He bent down, smiled, and stroked Jimmy’s bald spot.

Jimmy, giggling, said, “Stop it—you know it tickles.”

“Well, something other than this book has to make you smile!” He snickered. Ron looked into his son’s eyes and saw his own, young face.

He stood up to walk away, when Jimmy asked, “Dad, why do I get sick so much?” Ron slowly turned around to face his son.

“Well”, he began as he looked down, “it’s—it’s not you son— don’t worry, it will get better.” He bent down next to the bed again. “We will be helping you until you do.”

“I haven't seen my friends in so long. When can I go back?” His words hung.

“Soon, son. Soon.”

“But you always say that! I want to go back!“ Ron got close and patted his back.

“Look Jimmy, sometimes people become sick and they need to care for themselves. But when they feel better, they come out stronger—” he flexed his biceps “—and more confident. Don’t worry about it. You will be back with your friends in no time. I promise.” He grinned. “Ok?”

“Ok.” Ron’s phone began to ring and he stood up to get it. He went out the room and walked back down the hallway.

When he reached it, it was his boss.

“Hello?”

“Hello Ron. This is Robert.”

“Hi Robert, how are you?”

“Good thank you. Listen, I need to talk to you immediately. Please meet me in the café near your house.”

“Um..ok sure. Is there something important?”

“I’ll tell you when you come.”

“Of course, sir.”

“Please come…prepared” Robert hung up and the dial tone rang in the suspension.

Ron closed his phone, confused, and went to his closet. He dressed quickly and was thinking. What could he want so early in the morning? Was it that file I forgot to complete on Monday? I know, he forgot to give me the statistics for last month. He stomped downstairs, and an aroma submerged around him. His wife was making some eggs and bacon. He walked over to her and gave her a gentle kiss on the neck.

“How did you sleep Ron?

“Good thanks. I had another dream. It was…not appealing.”

“What was it?”

“It was a dark, scary dream. I was alone, without you.” She looked at him and smiled.

“It’s just another dream, honey. Just another dream.” She flipped the eggs onto the other side. “I need you to drop Jason at school and Jimmy to his chemotherapy session. I’ll come with you so I can comfort Jimmy.”

“Well, Susan. Robert called and he wants me to meet him for something.” She stopped baking and looked at him.

“What is it?” He shrugged.

“I’m not sure. He asked me to meet him at the café.” She went back to her business.

“Café Santé?” He nodded. “Ok, go there and come back quickly. We’ll drop off Jimmy and Jason then. Do you want some breakfast?”

“No time.” He grabbed his coat and keys and went out the door.
*
*
*

Ron parked the car at the local café and walked to the door. Through the windows, he saw Robert, a short, serious looking man drinking his coffee in an immaculate, black suit. Ron glanced at his own clothing and noticed that was wearing something much less appropriate. He wiped off any dust off his shirt and entered the café. He strode toward his boss and stretched out his hand.

“Hello Robert!”

“Hi Ron. Thank you for being here on short notice.”

“Not a problem. What did you need me for, sir”

“Here, grab a seat.” Ron plopped onto the chair. “Do you want some coffee?”

“Sure, I’ll order some later.” He gazed at his boss.

“Listen, Ron. You don’t have a family, do you?”

“Two boys and one beautiful wife.” He grinned, but Robert looked down and frowned.

“Um, well.” He raised his head, picked up his cup, and took a sip of his coffee. Ron stared at him the whole time. “Do you have any assets?” Robert glanced up to him. Ron was puzzled.

“Just an apartment in the city… sir.” A pause. “But it has almost no value because of the surrounding neighborhood.” Robert put down his cup and took a deep breath. He put his elbows on his thighs. They leaned close to each other.

“Ron, our company is ruined. There are too many competitors and we just can’t take the losses. I have had to meet personally with every employee personally and lay them off.” Ron’s mouth opened, and he lost focus. He absorbed the sentence and said, “But sir, weren't we doing…fine?”

Robert shook his head slowly. “This business was too volatile to begin with. Technology was not the right option. We were almost going to close it down five years ago in 1992, but we thankfully boosted back because of that new processor that we created.” Ron was poignant. “You’ll get three months pay until you find someplace else.”

How am I going to tell Susan? Where am I going to find another job? I have a family! I can’t support them without a job!

“Sir,” Ron could barely speak, “I was with this company since the beginning,” he gulped, “and I have no qualifications for another.”

“Look, Ron.” Robert came toward him and patted his back. “It will be—“

“Sir, you can’t do this. I have nowhere to go. My son has cancer, and he needs financial support more than ever!” he boasted, and a gentle tear rolled down his face.?The café became quiet.

“Settle down Ron. There is nothing I could do you about it, you have to understand.” Ron had enough. He stood up and grabbed his coat.

“Ron, I’m so sorry. Please—“

“See you in hell, Robert.” He stormed out with everyone’s gaze fixed on him. As he pushed the door open, he saw his coworker emerging from his car. Their family came over to Ron’s house on the weekends for dinner. He shook his head askance and went to his car.?




*
*
*

Ron entered the house and saw Susan standing with kids, ready to go.

“Where were you?” She didn't wait for an answer. She got up from the couch and went toward the car. “Come on kids.” She motioned Jimmy and Jason.

“Daddy, I’m going to be late to school”, Jason said as he hopped up and down.

“Sorry, son.” He took Jason’s hand and walked to the car. “Jimmy, do you want your cap.”

“No.” He prolonged his answer as he was staring at the caterpillar book.

“Ron, go, we’re late and we need to get to everything.”

Ron stepped on the gas and they were off. Jason was playing with a toy that he got from a McDonalds. He was flying it back and forth and making whooshing noises. Susan was on her phone checking the schedule for the doctor and wondering how long it would take. The car rolled through the familiar streets that Ron knew since he was a child.

“Ron, you need to speed up or we won’t make.” Instantly, the car accelerated a bit.

There was an interminably silence as everyone was busy with his or her own business. “Candle in the Wind” was playing softly in the background and the engine supplied a low hum. Ron made a left onto interstate 89 and joined the fast moving rush of traffic.

Susan broke the silence. “So, what did Robert say?”

“Uh. Well. Susan, I don’t think this will be an appropriate time.” Susan looked up.

“What?”

“I’ll tell you later.”

“Ron, what did Robert say?” She got closer to him.

“Well, honey, um.”

“Spit it out already.” Her voice was sharper.

“I can’t honey, please, later.”

“Ron, tell me!”, she yelled.

“Daddy…”, moaned Jason from the back.

Ron looked in the mirror for a second, and said, “Not now son.”

A truck came into their lane.

“Ron, we won’t see each other until tonight, and I have nothing to do in the doctors. Tell me what did Robert told you.”

“Ok, honey, this isn't easy but…”

“What is it Ron?” He looked away for a second at his wife and opened his mouth to speak, when Jimmy yelled, “Dad!” He pointed in between his two parents. The truck’s rear red lights lit up, and it stopped abruptly.

Ron slammed on the brakes, but they were going too fast. He steered abruptly to the right off the freeway. The car tumbled down the hill, bouncing. The roof caved inward with each bounce. Ron positioned himself in the corner. He tried to grab his wife, but she was too far. He braced on each impact. The car’s windows smashed open and the warm summer wind hit them as they twirled. They reached the bottom in a matter of seconds and the car stopped with one more spin, landing on its roof with a final thud. He waited.

Ron took off his seatbelt and saw smoke coming from the engine. He coughed and punched the remaining glass in his window as he crawled out. He crawled forward ten feet away and coughed again. The sun’s rays penetrated his shirt as he stared blankly at the ground. Ron pushed himself up and faced the car.


*
*
*

He woke up and felt around for his teddy bear, but it wasn’t there. He opened his eyes and was paralyzed by the light coming from the opening in the stairs.

“Teddy, where are you?” He looked around for the bear and found it lying a foot behind him. Ron grabbed for it.

“Hey teddy.” He whispered. “How are you?” He looked into the teddy bear’s reflecting eyes and saw his own face: the ragged figure of a man. “Did you sleep well?” he said, grinning. The teddy bear was covered in filth and had some cereal stuck to its arm. It was no bigger than the size of his two hands and was a color of bright beige. He spoke into its ear. “I had a rough dream. But it’s fine.” He sighed. “Just another dream.” He hugged the bear. “Just another dream.”