Silence fills my ears. I feel the pressure of the words trying to reach my brain. They don’t. I’m in a classroom full of words, people and numbers, yet it feels empty. I look around hoping to find something to harbor me back to reality. Willa is laughing through a conversation with Kydd. I can’t see their lips from here, so I'll never know what Kydd’s witty comments were.  Kydd is his last name. He has just always gone by Kydd. As I watch the two I being to drift off into my head. Halloween is close. The temperature is dropping, and the layers are beginning to suffocate me. Fall used to be full of colors, wind that seemed to know how to blow your hair into the perfect spot, and know when to stop raining so you weren’t all drenched. Now it howls all day long, with the occasional downpour always hitting when you're outside.

I close my eyes and pretend that I’m in the happiest place on earth. No it’s not Disneyland. It’s a warm place with glimmering grainy rocks, colored sparkles shining everywhere, thick air that lines your lungs with salt, and the downtempo rumbling rhythm. This is the one place where sound still appears. I don’t know or care if it is just an illusion. I can hear it.  I could lay around, do nothing there forever, but that would be redundant when there is countless things to familiarize yourself with. A heated flame is slowly beginning to fall out of the sky. Then, all at once there is a cool breeze. Ice covers everything. To the left the wind barks as it carries ice prickles.  I open my eyes and see it’s only Charles signalling me to pay attention.
Charles and I go way back. To about three months ago. Some people may think that isn’t very long, but when your new home is a floor of people who are sad all the time you quickly learn who is just as or less insane than you. We only spent two months living with our rooms sharing a wall. I only ever talked to Charles, with the exception of the therapists. Charles was forced to be with these people because he became stress that just seemed to barring him alive. He ended up having a few minutes where he wasn’t himself. His conscience decided to take a break. Only for a few minutes, but the damage was done. All he was left to do was pick himself up and follow the armed people out to a car, with shiny lights on the top, that brought him to this lovely place. I’m glad. I don’t think I would have returned to reality if I was in that place alone.  He needed someone to help with the weight of the world, and it just so happens that I was in need of an anchor.
People are getting up and leaving their seats. Lunch has finally arrived. Willa and Kydd wait for me and Charles to reach the door, and we walk together out to the tables. As soon as I finish eating Willa raises her eyebrows ever so slightly. Her mouth slowly curves forming a barely noticeable smile as her eyes dart to me. I give her a simple eye roll and say, “Go!” She waves her hands around in silly motions, and as she messes up she puts her hands down. Waits. Then starts again. I decode the encryption she has so clumsily performed. This drags for ten long minutes. Then I Bring my hands up and send different encryptions to Charles. His hands flow, and navigate like he’s always been able to send these secret messages. Willa rolls her eyes and snickers something in Kydd’s ear. Just to prove a point. We all laugh. Looking around I notice most people don't stare at our secret codes anymore, but a few still do. Kydd must have noticed that I was looking around. He’s always been good at knowing when to change the scenery. “Guys I think we have done all the book learning for the day. After all, the world is just waiting to punish us.” He declared. We all knew how this ends.
As we look both ways and cross the street turning left away from the school and towards the cars we smartly parked away from the parking lot. Willa asks, “Where are we going this time?”
Kydd laughs. “My father left the keys to the boat laying around. It would be a shame if the full gas tank wasn’t emptied a little.”
“You really are crazy if you think that will be fun.”
“Why?”
“Do you see the jackets that keep the cold out?”
“Oh, where to Charles?”
“I say we go south. It's friday we have a week off. The passports haven’t been used in a while. Our parents should be able to handle a text.”
I can’t seem to breath as the excitement fills me. “What the hell! Let's go!”
The cars don’t seem to start fast enough. Stopping at each house. We loose a car after a person comes back with a bag. The first time we did this we got to the house. For a few solid minutes we relaxed. Then we were escorted back to the States, by parents who had eyes of devils. The freedom isn’t free, but we are all willing to pay the price. The last house is mine.
I walk in, forgetting my father has Fridays off. He get’s up and turns abruptly.
“ I didn’t think you would be home so early. School is still going is it not?” He he says as his hands motion mouth is saying.
“Yes, it is but I’ve decided that the week of adventures has started now.”
“Okay. Heading south?” This time his hands firmly slice the air, and I can see behind that is fear.
“Mhm” My hands also firm and confident.
“Can I have the note please.” He asks. I reach in my pocket, and I give it to him. He reads it while I throw some things in a bag. “See you in a week. I love you.” His hands a comforting.
“Thanks. Love you too.” My hands soft and fluttery. We hug and I leave.
Any other day of the year and what looks like yelling is spouted from my father. He knows today is an anniversary that needs to be denounced. We are going to the only place that does that. The only place sound still thrives. It’s my birthday, but everyone knows that you don’t acknowledge this day.
Eleven thirty-seven and the countdown starts. Seven hours in the car. Music will fill the car. We turn it up high enough for the vibrations to be felt. Willa sings every line, as I feel the car shake to the beat. My mind goes to a place that I shouldn’t go, but I do because the questions left are haunting. Why? How did I take my safety for granite like that? What would have happened if Kydd wasn’t there?  How would things be different if it hadden’t happened? The questions never seem to end, but neither does the silence. I just that is something I can always count on now.
Two forty-nine. Our last American meal is at Subway. Our legs scrambly, but our eyes filled with delighted mystery. The car we drive is Kydd’s small red truck that has lived through quite a few decades, but never quits. We get back in mixing up where we sit.
Three twelve. They stop us and then let us keep driving. With the States behind us we’re getting closer. The house has changed over the years. There used to be a sail boat. It stood tall and help navigate me back. Things have changed since then. It is now buried by the sandstorms that dance through. Only the highest sail pole buts out of the sand. I don't need it to find my way back any more.
Five fifty-five. We have gone through the playlist of vibrations at least eight times. Willa still moves her mouth in sync with the vibrations. The deep blue patched with glossy green stripps out to the right of us. Ahead we see the dirt path that is the final hurdle to pass.
Seven o’clock. We arrived. The sun paints the sea with pastel reds and yellows. I can feel the rocking of the earth, and it is perfectly timed with the low rustling sound I can hear. We sit in chairs around the fire baking the pale marshmallows. I know I am home. It is a place I know I cannot stay. The world’s noise is silent, but the sound this place drums will always pull me back. I found the happiest place on earth.