Can'ts, Cans, Dreams, Plans | Teen Ink

Can'ts, Cans, Dreams, Plans

November 17, 2017
By Kenedy64 BRONZE, Canton, Michigan
Kenedy64 BRONZE, Canton, Michigan
1 article 0 photos 0 comments


“Turn your can't into a can, and your dreams into plans.” That quote constantly kept appearing in my head. Though as I grew up, turns out it wasn’t as simple as I assumed it would be. I grew up in a small traditional house in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania but soon moved to Forts Smith, Arkansas, where I currently live.  My name is Marie, Marian Writer to be definite. Everyone calls me Marie, for short. I am 17 years young, with black curly hair that ends right at below my shoulders. Hazel eyes, long curled eyelashes, and the average height of a 17-year-old. Although I am not like an average 17-year-old you would observe at school, I’m a bit of an outsider from everyone else.  I know it seems sad, but it’s true. I’m not one of the “popular” or “cool” kids,  more like the girl who remains in the corner of the lunchroom alone with her only friend. Emily Walker has been my best friend since 4th grade. We’re inseparable.  I am the only child. Often  I wish I had another sibling, like a brother. Although I can’t change that. So far, I’m doing fine in school.  I shouldn’t say fine, I’m doing excellent. I was constantly a  straight-A student, well I still am. I always had the highest grade in the class, got big grades on tests plus assignments. No need to brag or anything. Ever since day one, I constantly had one dream and that was to simply be successful in life and become a doctor, though my parents wanted different. Both my parents were involved in business, mainly accounting, and so they wanted me to follow their footsteps, although I didn’t want to. And so my dream soon began to fade my senior year.


“Marie . . . Marie!!” my mom yelled down from the kitchen. I acted as though I didn’t hear her and continued to write in my notebook. Anyways I am wrapping up my senior year. I have already applied to colleges, specifically Harvard.


“Marian, I know you hear me!” my mom once yelled again.


“Yes, mother I hear you!” I shout back as I set my pencil down, and gently begin to get out of bed.  
“Marian!!,” my mom yells again. Sometimes she can pretend as if she can’t hear, which can get really annoying. More specifically, she can act like me. My mom's sort of like the twin I never had, just different looks.  Instead, she has black short hair that ends below her ears, with dark brown eyes.


“Come down and digest some breakfast before your late for school!” she responded still yelling. I glimpse over at the clock, realizing I was going to be late if I don’t hurry up, and so I do. Tossing my hair up into a bun I quickly rush down to the kitchen,  take the bagel my mom prepared for me and rush out the door. Since my house is close to school, I always walk. Watching the birds glide from tree to tree, listening to the birds' tweet, and feeling the cold air brush against my face as I walk. The sky was as clear as can be, cars passing by throughout the neighborhood here and there. After moments of walking, I finally arrive at school, our school is a dream to be at. It is by far the best-looking school in the county with dark tan bricks along with window after window. Normally before school, everyone hangs around in the front socializing with their friends.
Strolling around, I quickly glance over to see Emily. Woah! As the kids would claim, “She had a glow up.” Emily appeared as if she got a whole makeover done, hair in a high blonde ponytail, pink patterned skirt, white top, and let's just say I’ve never viewed so much makeup on a person except for a Barbie doll . . . no offense. Although it was unusual, she was socializing with the “popular girls.” I’m gazing at her expecting for her to notice me, it seemed as if I was a stalker.


“What are you a creep,” a girl grunts while passing me. I’m used to people saying rude comments to and about me, so I just let it go. Eventually, Emily notices me, looking in the corner of her eyes but quickly blinking away. That was odd, I mention to myself and so I  decided to walk up to her.


“Hey Emily,” I say greeting her as her back is turned towards me. I wait for a response . . . no response.


And so I say again, “Hey Emily.”


Slowly and steadily, she turns around along with everyone else she was speaking to.  You know that awkward moment when you say something to someone and then they stare at you as if you were an alien that came down to outer space to capture you . . . well, that's me right now.


“Give me a second,” Emily tells her friends while grabbing my wrist and pulling me away. It was as if she was dragging me like a dog, not literally. Moments later, we end up at the side of the school under an oak tree with emerald green leaves.


“Since when do you talk to them?” I ask.


“Since when does it matter,” Emily responds in an irritated tone.


“I was just wondering goodness,” I replied annoyed.


“We need to address this whole situation,” Emily states.


“What situation?” I question.


“I’m sorry for what I’m about to say, but it’s for the best,” she udders.


“Just say it,” I responded eagerly.


“We can’t be friends anymore,” Emily replies while looking down at the shamrock green grass.


“Wait . . . what, why?” I question anxiously.


“You really wanna know why Marie?” reacting with attitude Emily questions.


“Well yes, that's what this conversation is about,” I respond a bit confused. Ding, ding, ding! The sound of the loud bell rings which means we should be in our class by now, but I didn’t care at the moment, I wanted to hear Emily out, and so we continue speaking.


“You’re a shadow of everyone else when I’m with you people act as if I’m the psycho, no offense.  It’s my last year and it’s about time I grow up, I don’t want to and I can’t be seen walking, communicating, and hanging around with a geek who everyone hates,” she explains. But the thing is, she’s right on the last part, everyone does hate me and I wish I knew why.


“But . . . but we’ve been best friends forever, I can’t forget you,” I hesitate.


“Well find a way to,” Emily responds with sass. Ohh no to the no, I’m not dealing with her sass this morning I say in my head.


And so I respond with sass, “Well how am I supposed to forget you when every time I walk outside and see a trashcan it reminds me of you?” I can tell she was shocked by what I said, she just stood there speechless.
“I’m already late for class, I got to go,” Emily chats while storming off into the distance annoyed. Turning around to watch her storm off, she cautiously stops and turns around to face me.


“Oh and by the way, don’t stare at me, come near me, or speak to me,” Emily demands then continues to storm off. And so right then at that moment, I knew that I just lost my one and only friend.


The rest of the day was dull, I spoke to no one, well I didn’t really have anyone to speak to. You’re probably thinking a big school with a lot of people, you can make a friend instantly. Well, that’s not the case, they always end up judging you or leaving you. Head down, I put in my earbuds to listen to music and begin to walk home.


“Hey sweetie how was your day,” my mom beams with joy as I walk in through the door.


“Couldn’t be any better,” I sarcastically respond.


“Anyways, why are you in such a good mood?” I question, as we walk to the kitchen.


“Because I received amazing news for a little birdie that lives in this house!” my mom responds.


“And that is?” I eagerly question.


“Yale sent me an acceptance letter because you got in!!!” she burst out yelling jumping with joy.


“OMG you're joking, no way,” I respond thrilled with a big smile on my face.


“Yes way!” my mom responds as excited as can be. As  I stated earlier, I applied for Yale, and well I got in! There we were in the kitchen jumping with joy with big smiles on our faces, though this moment didn’t last very long.


“So, do you know what type of business you want to study yet?” my mom questions as we settle down.


“Mom, you know I want to be a doctor, I’m not interested in business,” I calmly state.


“Are you out of your mind, you really want to complete a 4-year undergraduate degree program, then spend 4 years in medical school, THAN complete 3-7 years of residency??” she questions shocked.


“No mother I’m not out of my mind, I have wanted to be a doctor since I was a kid, I researched it and everything, ” I reply irritated.


Rolling her eyes she responds, “I have done research also, I have been in touch with the academic advisors and everything, I have set everything up for you!” my mom exclaims.


“Exactly YOU have set everything for me, I don't want to be known as the kid whose mom has to do everything for me,” I respond annoyed.


“You always mention that you want me to be happy, well if that's so you would want what's best for me, and allow me to make my own decisions” I add. She doesn’t respond, it’s just silence, plain silence.


“Are you going to say something?” I question.


“Get out,” she responds.


“What??” I question confused.


“Get out now, you want to be a doctor and go out on your own then go do so, get out,” she states in anger.
“Ok, and when I’m a successful doctor, don’t come running back,” I mutter under my breath while storming off to gather my stuff.


“What did you just say?” my mom questions.


“Funny, you can hear me speak under my breath but can’t hear me yell “YES!” from up in my bedroom,” I respond with sass while storming off upstairs. I head to my room, full of anger, face red, I pack up my things, head downstairs and get ready to leave right when my dad strolls in through the door from work. The thing about my dad is he looked as if he were a businessman, dressed in suit and tie, black short hair with a buzzcut.
“Where do you plan on going?” My dad questions looking at my bags.


“Away,” I respond quickly while storming out the door.


Seconds after, my mom comes running out the door and shouts, “You can’t do it alone, and soon you will see that!”


“Hey, mom before I go, remember one thing, turn that can’t into the can,” I respond smiling while walking off. I didn’t know where to go, I had nowhere to go, except there was one person that might just hear me out.
Knock, knock, knock . . . no response,  knock, knock, knock. The door slowly opens.


“Hi Emily,” I stutter. She closes the door on me, and so I knock again. Knock, knock, knock.


“What do you want?” Emily questions annoyed reopening the door. And so I tell her, about everything that happened and how I had nowhere to go, and her response wasn’t much better than my mom’s regarding the whole doctor situation. “Woah! You have to dedicate a lot of your time in college, longer than most other careers, you can’t do that” Emily responds shocked.


“Can't-do what, become a doctor,” I question her.


“Well . . . yea,” she responds.


“I already have two discouraging parents telling me I “can’t” do it also, I don’t need another one,” I respond settle.


“Anyways, you think I am just gonna let you in after everything you said?” she questions.


“Well, are you really going to close the door on me,” I reply waiting for a response.


“Come on,” she responds directing me to the house.


“Mom, Marie is going to be staying here for a while I will explain later!” Marie shouts out to her mom.


“Ok, you will be staying in here, if you need anything lemme know,” Marie says pointing out to the room.

“Thank you so much,” I respond thanking her.


“Mhm,” Emily replies.


Days pass by, which lead to weeks, my parents have both called and messaged me multiple times but I always leave them on voicemail and respond with a simple text saying, “I’m ok.” Going to school, then going to Emily’s.Emily has been nice enough to let me stay at her house a little longer. My graduation is, later on, today and I am super psyched. Emily and I went dress shopping not too long ago we act as if we never got into a fight and that we were still close best friends.


“Do you know if your parents are coming to the graduation,” Emily asks walking into the room.


“Yes, they texted me earlier letting me know,” I respond.


“Well that’s good,” she replies


. “What are you doing, come on let's get ready,” Emily says beaming with joy. And so we do. Hours later, there we were, I’ve never felt so beautiful before. I felt like if I were to dress like this every day to school, not a single person would make fun of me and everyone would want to be my friend. I had makeup on and everything, I had a black pleated dress that stopped right above my knees. Emily had on a Burgundy off the shoulder dress. Both of our hair was down and curled, we both looked amazing. And also Emily didn’t look like a Barbie doll… which was a good thing, no offense. Emily’s parents drove us to the graduation, it was a nice, sunny day, perfect for a graduation. Before I knew it, there I was sitting waiting for the professor to call my name for me to receive my diploma. Looking into the crowd, I could see my parents, it was going to be awkward confronting them afterward.


“Marian Writer,” the professor calls. I get up and do just as I practiced, I shake the (blanks) hand with my left and receive my diploma in my right, then continue to walk on stage. I felt amazing, I have been waiting for this moment forever, and it finally happened. Hours later, after smiling and giggling, the graduation is over.


“Marie!” my mom calls. My heart begins to sink this wasn’t going to turn out good I say to myself.


“Before you say anything, nothing can change my mind at this point I want to become a doctor and nothing else. I’m sorry that you both wanted different, I’m also sorry that I didn’t follow your guy’s footsteps. But it was my choice and this is what I came up with and if you,” I get interrupted by my mom.


“Marie, Marie, slow down,” my mom says settle. Before I could say or do anything both my mom and dad hug me.


“We love you,” my dad whispers in my ear.


“I love you guys too,” I responded smiling. If I need any inspiration, I always look back at this moment as to never give up.


5 years later, here I am in college still studying, I honestly couldn’t have asked for anything different. I stay in the dorms at Yale. My mom calls me every day and my dad texts me whenever he can. As time went by, they became more supportive of what I was doing, and I was proud of that, moreover, Emily and I still keep in touch. She ended up going to Indiana University and is studying to become a teacher.  My dream of becoming successful and a doctor was actually becoming true. 7 years later, I was finally graduating from college. I received my Bachelors and Med School degree and became the successful doctor I wanted to be. There were ten simple words that kept me going, and taught me not to give up. “Turn your cant into a can, and your dreams into plans,” and so I did.


The author's comments:

What inspired me to write this piece is I've been in situations where my parents want one thing, but I want another. So, this inspired me to write this piece. I hope this piece will inspire others that there will be tough times in life, but you just have to keep going and to not discourage yourself.


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