Please
Please do not protest.
Please don’t say I didn’t know what I was talking about,
because I know what I saw.
Please don’t call me confused,
it’s awfully hard for my eyes to lie.
Please, don’t you dare call me young and naïve,
because my age is just a number.
And at any age,
I would know that I saw you
You who told me that I was your one and your only.
I would also know that I saw her
A beautiful stranger to my eyes.
And I saw you
Together.
I saw you kiss her
And her kiss you.
Your lips,
Which had just recently left mine,
On hers.
I saw you glance up
And saw you seeing me.
You, realizing that your little game
Was over.
I heard her gasp
Heard the air whistle through her sparkling white teeth
And saw her shock.

Did you tell her what you told me?
Was she your baby,
your dearest,
your sweetheart?
Her confusion was painfully apparent,
The look on her face almost, but not quite, comical to behold.
Was I your sister?
Why did I look so devastated
And why did you look so guilty?
You two weren’t doing anything wrong,
Right?
Just passionately kissing.
And there is nothing wrong with that
when people are as in love as you two are.
The poor girl was just as in thrall of your
Cool confidence and hidden sweetness
as I had been.
But as I learned,
that sweetness was just another mask of yours.

After making my little discovery,
I shut the door and left the apartment
That we had bought together,
Had chosen together.
I could hear her whimpering from inside
our home.
Her protests, begging you to stay.
Poor girl didn’t realize,
You never listen.
Once, that was attractive to me.
When you were not listening to others
and only to me.
But now I am one of the others,
on the outside of your little world,
and she isn’t in yet.

I heard her heels clacking on the wooden floor
that made the apartment so attractive to us.
The door opened and she saw me,
sitting on the floor, staring blankly at the beige wall front of me.
Her eyes asked what her mouth can’t seem to spit out.
I’m his fiancé
I stated, as calmly as possible.
She sat beside me.
I didn’t know, I’m so sorry
She cried.
I should have known this was coming, you are just the proof I was looking for,
not wanting to find, but knowing I would.
I said the line tearlessly, because you are not worth my tears.
She pulled herself together, and we went out for coffee
like two old friends, not girls recovering from you.

I suppose I could thank you for her.
She is now a close confidante
and a dear friend.
And I can thank you for the apartment,
and giving it up without a big fight.
I have a roommate now,
so much better than having you,
because our petty fights don’t put my future in peril.
I can thank you for taking the television
because now I read more.
And for insisting we buy a teapot,
because tea is my favorite new drink.
I can thank you also
for the experience of having my heart
dropped and shattered.
I know so much better now.
I know that this may happen again,
Except now I how exactly to pick up the pieces
And what metaphorical glue works best.

So thank you for breaking me
And goodbye.