It's been a year. A long interesting year since the day everyone says I made the biggest mistake of my life. I probably did, I still don't know, there's still so much confusion to this whole situation. No, I'm not talking about the time I got drunk, threw up all over some guy I liked, and then passed out at a party, or the time I had sex for the first time as a freshman to a senior who told the entire school and made my life hell for a month, or the time I got busted smoking a blunt with my bestfriend. I'm not talking about any of those times, because they haven't occured yet. I don't drink, heaavily, at least, don't smoke, and I am most definetly a virgin. This incident, as everyone calls "big mistake", probably isnt as bad as people make it out to be. It happens to everybody, and apparently it affects everybody too.
My name is Audrey Havran, and my "mistake" is breaking up with my boyfriend of one year, one month, and three days, or he's also known as, THE best boyfriend I ever had, and the person who taught me how to love. He was my hard candy with a surprise center, the sharpest crayon in the box, and the was the realest person I knew. He opened car doors for me, everytime we went anywhere, even to the corner store, he brought me everything I needed, when I needed it, and occasionly got me small gifts simply because he was thinking about me. He gave me the good morning text every morning, and the good night text every night before he went to bed. He stood by my bed side when I was sick, and refused to leave. He always knew what to say, but his kind words never came off as fake. He got along great with my parents, even my grandparents.
Aside his charming personality, he was flawless when it came to his looks; extra gorgeous, big dark brown, almost black eyes, light brown short hair. This face, accompanied, with big muscles, the Taylor Lautner eight-pack poster you have hanging on your wall type of body. He ran track and cross counry, and was a startng basketball point guard on varsity. He was basically an all-in-one package.
Believe me, it was certainly not easy coming to my decision, at all. But I strongly beleive I couldn't help it. As a new sophomore in high school, I thought this decision would be a clean break, like he would just understand and it'd be over and done with. Dumbfoundedly, I was proved wrong, because he didn't understand. Nobody understood. This decision cost me a lot more than a great guy. It caused a lot of loss, a lot of tears, aches, and unhappy lonlieness. It caused fights, (girl fights, not fist fights) drama, between everybody it seemed, and lot's of lies.
This is because everyone loved him, just the way I did. Everyone adapted to him in ways your parents don't with your boyfriend. MY friends adapted to him in ways that should make a girlfriend worry, but I didn't, because I knew him better than that. I got compliments on him around the clock, saying how great he was to me, like I already didn't know.
Jonathan Maxwell was the love of my life. I was almost sure of it. I didn't want anybody else, because I already had the best. With Jonathan, it was always a win win situation. Ther was never anything seriously wrong with our relationship. We fought and argued over the silliest things every now and then, but it kept our relationship interesting. We were seen as the couple that would last forever, the one that'd get married after highschool, and start a family, sitting in our rocking chairs with gray hair one day. Even I saw us as perfect, from the surface at least. That was until, that summer, our first summer together. It wasthe time that opened my eyes to the real temptations around me, it was crazy because the nine we were together, the only boy on my mind all day, was him. Other boys never concerned me, not even if I knew how gorgeous they were. During that summer, I don't know what it was, but almost every guy I saw I felt attracted to, lustfully. Whether their shirt was on or off, hair was shaggy like I like it, eyes were the perfect shade of brown, I couldn't stop myself from staring. But even though I was surrounded by a lot of temptation, I never did anything about it. Things did begin to go downhill from there though, and the last words he said to me were, "At least it was great while it lasted."