*For confidentiality reasons, the names in this piece have been changed*

As I entered the school, I knew it would be a long day. Spring Break was over and I was still adjusting to getting up early. It was my last quarter in middle school and I couldn’t have been more relieved. Next year I would be attending high school and I was more than ready to be a freshman.
    I walked down the hall to my locker. As I passed by, I saw faces with looks of despair and disgust, similar to the one that I obtained on my face. The whole school was ready to have summer. No one wanted to be there. Just by walking by, you could tell what people were thinking.
    My friend, Lizzy joined me as I continued to my locker. We just walked in silence. I finally got to my locker and as I opened it, I was greeted by my geometry textbook as it fell on my head. I let out a sigh as Lizzy continued to laugh at me.
    "How was Spring Break?" she asked me unaware that my dad had been in the hospital and I had seen a fatal car crash while on the highway. Let’s just say Spring Break didn’t go as planned.
    "Fine. How about you?" I lied, not wanting to pursue further conversation.
    "Good, I rearranged my room, I watched a lot of Netflix..." she continued on but it all was just a blur to me. When we got to our first class, history and I realized that I wasn't sure how long she had been talking. She noticed the blank expression on my face and nudged my and I came back to the present day.
    History was hard today. I couldn't concentrate. Every little thing seemed to annoy me and I just wanted to go home. It was strange because I like history and it is one of my favorite classes, but at that moment I wished that I could be anywhere else but there. History went so slow that I swear time stopped. When the bell rang again, I was happy and unhappy at the same time. I was done with one class and I only had six more to go, but next period I would have to see my ex-boyfriend and a bunch of other people that I'm not fond of.
    Science was just down the hall and I got there with plenty of time to spare before the bell rang. I walked in and took my usual seat but as I glanced up at the board, I saw something saying that we had new seats today. I sighed knowing that mine wouldn't be any better than the one I was currently at. The day was continuing to be uneventful and boring just as I had expected. Class was just about to start but I was in no mood to learn about Newton's Laws of Motion.
    All of the sudden I heard what I could only perceive to be a herd of elephants walking into the room, but it was only my ex-boyfriend and his friends. I looked among them to see what crowd he had brought with him today. I saw all the usuals but there seemed to be more of them for some reason. There was a good reason for it seeming like more, there was one more. He was talk and looked strong and a little beefy, sort of like a football player. His hair was black and he had big white shoes. At first glance, I wouldn't have thought anything special of him, but as I looked a little more, I saw him smile. The whole room lit up and for the first time in awhile, I felt flustered. Nobody else seemed to notice him, but I personally couldn't stop staring into his deep, endless, sparkling brown eyes. He sat down and the group of guys started to crowd around him. I couldn't tell if he felt overwhelmed or didn't mind.
    My train of thought was interrupted by the loud and startling whistle of my teacher. I stopped staring and focused my attention on the front board.
    "Grab your stuff and I will tell you where your new seats are." Mrs. Taylor said as she stood up. I reached for my binder, and like the clumsy person I was, I promptly knocked it off my desk. Quickly, I reached down to pick it but. I hoped nobody noticed.
    As my teacher called off names and pointed to desks, as fewer desks remained, my stomach started turning and all I wanted was to sit next to him. I was so involved in my fantasy that I didn’t hear when my name was called. My friend Ella nudged me a little and I realized that everyone was staring at me. Every time I thought about him, the world seemed to stand still and I lost track of everything else that was happening around me.
    Much to my disappointment, he didn’t get assigned to sit next to me. He wasn’t too far away but I wanted  him closer. As class continued I learned that his name was Josh. That would make three Josh’s at my school. One Josh was one of the most annoying people I have ever met and also in my science class. They other Josh was also new this year but he had been here a while, he was sort of cute. Everyone thought he was drop dead gorgeous but I guess he wasn’t my type. He was nice enough but he hung out with the popular clique. But now we had a Josh at our school that was cute and seemed like a nice guy. Of course, to actually know if he was nice, I would have to get up the nerve to speak to him.
    When it comes to talking to guys, I don’t exactly have the best confidence. I am just so very awkward that I get over there and I don’t know what to say and I make a fool of myself. In the worst way possible I wanted to talk to him. I wanted to know where he was going to high school because he got here the last quarter of my life in middle school and if he is nice, I don’t want him to disappear and go to another high school.
    The whole thing was just so stupid. I spent the whole class period hoping he would talk to me or an opportunity would open up where I could start a conversation with him and it wouldn’t be awkward. All these endless hopes that he would talk to me were pointless. I am definitely not the most attractive girl in the school and he probably doesn’t even know that I exist. Realizing that did nothing and my brain continued on to ride the endless train of thought that went nowhere and was centered around Josh.
    The class continued on, going faster than I had hoped. Towards the end of the period, I got a chance to go over and talk to my friends who were conveniently sitting next to him. As I walked over, my knees began to tremble and I felt faint. How could any one person make someone feel so nervous and excited at the same time? I’d never felt something quite like it before. When I got over there, I just stood there and was a simple bystander in the conversation that was taking place between my friends. I was too busy trying to look my best and get Josh to notice me. I felt childish but I was desperate.
    My thoughts wandered away and I became still and unaware of what was happening around me. Bam! Someone had dropped a binder and it was just the thing I needed to bring me back to reality. I glanced over at Josh and to my surprise he looked me and smiled. It took every muscle in my body not to collapse. I smiled back trying to look cute and shy and anything but the nervous wreck that I felt like on the inside. I quickly looked away, noticing that I had been staring at his flawless face for longer than I realized.
As the bell rang, I went to my other classes and the day went quickly. Every time I went to a new class all I hoped was that he was in there too. As the day continued, a phrase was embedded into my head and in a way it haunted me. It was always in the back of my mind. It felt like a ghost was following me and I couldn’t get it to leave. The words were always there just repeating themselves over and over, notice me, notice me, notice me.