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I've got a time machine and I'm armed.
<Video Journal of Doctor Robert Barrow, Entry 713.>
“I’ve done it! I’ve done it! Centuries of research, and I am the culmination of it all!” <Robert gestures to a machine behind him.> “The time machine! I haven’t tested it yet, but…” <Another Robert comes in front of the camera, and starts slapping him. Possible error, request maintenance. Temporarily assigned titles 01 and 02> “Why are you hitting yourself? Why are you hitting yourself?” “Stop it! Alright, so about five minutes ago, this guy<Points to 02> came and told me it works! And it does. So when did you say I have to leave?” “About now.” “Alright! <He walks toward the machine and clamps himself in. For exact knowledge of how T-79 works, see blueprint. 02 walks towards camera as 01 disappears. Temporary short out. 02 reassigned Robert> “Phewph. Damn paradoxes. Already I’m giving myself a headache. So… I have become the most powerful man on Earth. What should I do…” <Robert reaches back and shuts off camera. After 3 days, switched back on.>
Robert holds a M1911A1 semi-automatic pistol in hand.> “Well, I’ve decided. You know how they always say if you have a time machine, kill Hitler? I think I will. <Walks back towards T-79, strapping himself in. Other Robert appears (Reclassified as 02 Paradox) with a Colt .45 revolver and shoots at 01. 01 narrowly escapes bullet and disappears. 02 begins roaming around laboratory, destroying equipment and burning research. When he turns toward the camera, he looks gaunt, with a shorn. Estimate he has not shaved for several days.>
“Huh. Forgot I had this thing. <He walks toward it, into chair.> How long has it been… days since I invented the T-79? All this time, I never knew what I was getting into. Might as well tell this thing what happened in case anyone ever finds this.”
“When I strapped myself in, I saw me come out with a gun. He tried to shoot, and it dinged against the titanium chassis. That should have been the first indication something was wrong. At that point, I felt something warm against my leg, similar to my first experiment with the thing. Either it was some sort of radiation, or I’m easily scared shitless. Anyways, I passed out and woke up on top of a dumpster in Berlin. By my guesstimate, this was the day of Kristallnacht, so I had to act fast. After mugging someone of their pants with my gun, which was difficult due to the fact we didn’t speak the same language, I made out for where Hitler was going to dine. A few hours later, Hitler and some other people (I recognized Goebbels among them) walked in to where I was hiding. Aiming down the iron sights, I fired. I missed. The bullet grazed along his stomach, drawing a red ribbon across his pristine uniform. He fell to the ground, clutching his stomach, and as one rushed to aid him; I was attacked and lost consciousness. When I woke up, I was in the hands of the Gestapo, and it only took a few days of “Interrogation” for me to tell them what I’ve been doing. I taught them how to operate the T-79… they became unstoppable. After years of working for them, I barely managed to escape and get to their “upgraded model”, the size of a wristwatch and as easy to produce.
I knew I was going to fail to kill myself... didn’t stop me from trying. <He fingers his gun.> Huh. You know they still have a warrant out for my arrest. I guess it’s time to stop running <He puts the gun to his temple. Camera is turned off.>”.
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