R-16's | Teen Ink

R-16's

May 28, 2013
By BookNerd35 GOLD, Herod, Illinois
BookNerd35 GOLD, Herod, Illinois
10 articles 1 photo 60 comments

Favorite Quote:
There are so many people out there who will tell you that you can't. What you've got to do is turn around and say, 'watch me.' -unknown


595. That’s how many days the world had been in chaos. They had come on the 16th of August. Big, unworldly creatures. Later, after destroying half the worlds population, they morphed. Becoming human like shapes, but they weren’t human. Three months after that, they brought in more of their kind. After another month, they killed off anyone over the age of fifty, ultimately cutting of another 35% of our population. These foreign invaders became known as R-16’s. The R naming the color of their eyes; 16 naming the day our world was turned upside down.

Schooling for people over 16 was abolished . Only the richest R-16 praising families were allowed education after that. That left the under-educated to scrounge up simple and low paying jobs. Cars became a luxury, leaving less then 10,000 in the world. New drugs surfaced, along with new forms of liquor. The drugs gave you a high then a day later left you mad, paralyzed, or dead. The booze were addicting, leaving you wanting more. Men and women became homeless, due to the prices of that magic amber and silver liquor.

Disease ridden scavengers were found in allies, either half-dead and twitching or already there. Hospitals were rare, only found in the heart of big cities. Meaning clinics were set up in back rooms that were disease filled. Rebellions broke out often leaving men, women, teens, and children strung in the middle of town for all to see. The children weren’t even involve, just examples.

That’s what the world had become

Drugs

Disease

Rebellion


The author's comments:
I was in History class and got bored. So being the nerd I am, I pulled out my notebook and started writing about a different world. A world that could become ours (just exclude the aliens.)

Similar Articles

JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 5 comments.


on Jun. 5 2013 at 5:48 pm
BlackbeltJames GOLD, Reading, Other
14 articles 0 photos 193 comments

Favorite Quote:
Isaac Asimov - "Intelligence is an accident of evolution, and not necessarily an advantage.”

Your ideas are very good, however, I feel that it is not so much of a story, but more that you are telling me facts about this world you have thought of. Try to tell us these facts in an interesting way; maybe have flashbacks of random news reports or something like that, a way of telling us these interesting and important facts without making it tedious, but keeping the reader interested.
It is a good start, and it might be flash fiction, but I think you need a little bit more detail and more of a plot or a way of telling the story without making it obvious your jsut telling facts. Try and make an impact on the reader, make sure they know it is traumatic and horrible. :)

on Jun. 1 2013 at 9:22 pm
E.J.Mathews GOLD, International Falls, Minnesota
19 articles 2 photos 145 comments
This was pretty good. The only thing I would suggest would b to add more detail and imagery in there.

on May. 30 2013 at 8:40 pm
BookNerd35 GOLD, Herod, Illinois
10 articles 1 photo 60 comments

Favorite Quote:
There are so many people out there who will tell you that you can't. What you've got to do is turn around and say, 'watch me.' -unknown

Thanks! Actually stuff like this is all I write!

sarah98 BRONZE said...
on May. 30 2013 at 6:59 pm
sarah98 BRONZE, Holyoke, Massachusetts
1 article 0 photos 405 comments

Favorite Quote:
It is better to write for yourself and have no audience than write for your audience and have no self.

o my gosh. this was fantastic. please keep writing stuff like this

on May. 29 2013 at 8:28 pm
RoyalCorona SILVER, Grand Rapids, Michigan
7 articles 0 photos 290 comments

Favorite Quote:
All of us fave failed to match our dream of perfection. I rate us on the basis of our splendid failure to do the impossible. -William Faulkner

Great job!! I really like this one and think that there should be a sequel!! I love this story!!