I remember the first time I saw Julie. She had barely been alive for a full day when she dreamed me up. I popped in to see the most beautiful little baby girl dreaming softly in her crib. Slowly, she opened up her big sleepy brown eyes and looked up at me. And that’s when I knew. That’s when I knew what my job as an imaginary friend was. I was here to protect her and love her for as long as she needed me. Sometimes, though, children force their imaginary friends away by growing up too quickly, but when I looked at Julie, I knew this would never be the case for us. She recognized me immediately. She had created me, hadn’t she? The first few years of her life were pure bliss. We would sit and play all day. She loved to laugh and the thing that made her laugh the most was when she pulled on my big floppy ears and they bounced up again. It wasn’t until she was a little older that I finally got my name.

Julie was very smart as a little girl. She was able to talk before all the other children her age. One day we were playing in the family room with her parents. All the sudden she stopped playing, looked at me, and concentrated really hard before saying, “Gilly!” Her parents were surprised at the sudden outburst of their little girl but were delighted to hear her speak.
“Gilly!” she said, “Gilly, Gilly, Gilly!” They didn’t know quite what she was trying to say, but I got the message. I was Gilly. And from that day forth that’s who Julie introduced me as, and that’s who I was. I loved it! It was perfect, and I told her so. She laughed and clapped her hands, glad that I did like it.
The next few years involved a lot of the same things. As she got older she learned more words and we would explore the world together. All we did was play and laugh, and pretend. But, pretty soon it was time for us to go to preschool. I had never heard of preschool before, but it sounded terrible. I mean, having to stay in the same place for four hours every day with people telling you what to do and making you learn things. We prepared ourselves, though, so when the time came we would be ready.
When the day came for us to go to finally go to preschool we were prepared for anything. What we weren’t prepared for, however, was more playtime. This was nothing like what we were expecting. It was awesome, like before, only better because there were more kids to play with! And because there were so many new kids there were also so many new imaginary friends as well. In one corner of the room a girl named Maria and her imaginary friend Leemba were fighting a dragon over a pit of lava and on the other side of the room Andrew and his imaginary friend Kyle the Dinosaur were at a circus. There were so many different lands and adventures to choose from that it was hard to pick. We decided to go scale a mountain top with a girl named Anna. Anna’s imaginary friend was a little girl name Samantha. We always had lots of fun playing with Anna and Samantha and we went on all sorts of crazy adventures. One day we would be river rafting in the Amazon and the next we would be having tea with the Queen of England. Anna usually got to choose where we were going that day, but Julie didn’t mind as long as it was exciting.
Eventually Julie and Anna had to go to real school. Real school wasn’t as fun because imaginary friends couldn’t go in the building. We can only go places that are full of creativity and imagination. Sure some parts of the school were creative, but the overall lack of imagines made it impossible for us to enter. That was okay, though, because we could all still play together at recess. And at recess there were no limits to how creative we could be! Julie and I always had the best imagines and all the kids would want to come and be in our stories, except for a few girls who liked to sit and talk about which boy was the cutest or who had the prettiest hair that day. Slowly Anna started to drift away from Julie and me and towards them.
One day while the kids were all at math and we were waiting for them to come back out Samantha confessed that she was really worried about Anna.
“What if she’s growing up too fast?” said Samantha, “How can I keep her safe if she doesn’t want me there anymore?” I didn’t want to acknowledge it, but Samantha had started to look a little less solid.
“I’m sure everything will be fine,” I said, “Why don’t you just talk to her about it? Then I’m sure she’ll realize what will happen if she makes you leave.”
“Okay, I’ll talk to her tonight. It’s just that I’m so scared. I don’t want to leave, no one knows what happens when you disappear before you’re supposed to,” she sobbed.
“I know, but whatever happens will be fine, I promise,” I said patting her on the back, and at the same time, hoping that I was right. As the day went on Samantha started to slowly fade and become more transparent. When Anna’s mom came to pick her up that day after school, I knew I was waving goodbye to Samantha for the last time. The next day Anna came to school alone and seemingly unaffected by the loss of her oldest friend. That night when Julie was going to bed I gave her a huge hug.
“What was that for?” she asked.
“Oh, just because I love you,” and I thanked God that I had her and that she still loved me.
“I love you too, Gilly,” she said, “I’ll always love you.”
The next few years flew by and suddenly Julie was in middle school. Even though many other imaginary friends disappeared over the years, we were always together. As she grew up, I did too and I became less of a playmate and more of a confidante. When she went to middle school and I couldn’t come to school anymore, I would wait for her to come home and be ready to hear all about what happened at school that day.
One day when we were hanging out with Anna at the mall, Anna casually said, “You know, Julie, you should really get rid of your imaginary friend. It’s kinda embarrassing that you still have one and you’re twelve.”
“Gilly isn’t an imaginary friend. She’s just, she’s just a-,” Julie stammered.
“If you don’t get rid of her I don’t think I can stay friends with you. It totally makes you look like a baby and if I associate with you then people will think I’m a baby too,” Anna said, not looking up as she dabbed grease from her pizza.
“Are you serious? We’ve been friends since, like, preschool and you wanna stop because you don’t like Gilly? Well fine then. We won’t be friends, but you’re wrong. There’s nothing wrong with having Gilly, okay?” said Julie, on the verge of tears.
“Now you’re gonna cry about it? Jeez, don’t be such a baby, Julie,” said Anna, “See you at school, loser,” She said as she stalked off.
I was stunned by what just happened. I mean, we had known Anna for years. Sure she could be a little insensitive at times, but this was just so- I guess I should have known all those years ago when Samantha disappeared before she was supposed to. I tried to comfort Julie as best as I could, but there was only so much I could do. As we sat with Julie’s silent tears running down her face, I heard shy footsteps approaching us.
“Hey,” said the voice, “you okay?” The voice belonged to a timid boy about Julie’s age who looked vaguely familiar.
“What? Oh, oh yeah, I’m fine. Thanks, though,” Julie said, clearly not fine.
“I’m, uh, I’m Andrew,” the boy said, taking a seat, “She’s wrong, you know. About having not really an imaginary friend, but someone to talk to, and to listen; that’s real for you but not for anyone else. It’s not weird.”
At this Julie looked up and wiped away her tears. Maybe this boy could help more than I could.
“Really, I have one too. His name is Kyle. He’s a dinosaur.”
That’s why he was so familiar! Andrew was in Julie’s preschool class and we used to play with him and his imaginary friend Kyle.
“Mine’s name is Gilly. She’s kinda like a giant bunny only with an apron,” said Julie.
“Cool! She sounds awesome. Hey! I know what will make you feel better, how ‘bout we get some ice cream?”
After that day Andrew and Julie became inseparable. They became the best of friends and they stayed close all through middle school and high school. She came home every day with new stories of adventures or trouble that she and Andrew had gotten into that day. We still stayed close but she was slowly becoming more independent.
When she graduated from high school I couldn’t believe how much had changed since she first thought me up eighteen years earlier. She had grown so much but she was still my little Julie. She and Andrew were going to different colleges, but they promised each other that they would keep in touch, and I knew they would. The day Julie went away to college I stayed at home. I couldn’t go with her, and she knew that, but I would be right at home waiting for her when she came back. It was hard to say goodbye to her the first time she left home without me, but I was only two hours away so if she ever needed me all she had to do was come home.
Different people walked in and out of her life through her college years but Andrew and I were the two constants. She veered off the path a few times but each time she always came back to us, safe and sound. I think I knew what was happening before she did. It happened gradually but as time went on it became more apparent. No boyfriend lasted long because none of them were as kind or caring as Andrew. And as time passed, I began preparing for the day when Julie would no longer need me to protect her and love her. One day she would find someone else who would love as much as I did. That would be the day I would have to go.
I had yet to see Julie happier than the day Andrew proposed. It was the summer after they had graduated from college. Neither one of them had a penny to their name, nor a job prospect in sight, but it didn’t matter. She and Andrew had gone to the mall to pick up some things for a friend. When she got back she couldn’t contain her excitement. She told me that they had gone for ice cream at the same place he had taken her to back when he first introduced Kyle. He got down on one knee right there in the ice cream parlor and asked her to marry him. He had wanted to take her out to a fancy dinner, but after consulting with Kyle, he decided to take her back to the spot where he first fell in love with her.
We spent the next year planning her wedding. It would be simple, but beautiful and elegant. I had always known when I would have to leave, but I don’t think Julie ever did I don’t really think she thought I would ever leave, because she didn’t think I ever had too. The night before her wedding I told her goodnight and packed up my things. I would have to leave in the morning, but I didn’t want to ruin her big day by her worrying about my leaving.
The next morning as I helped her get ready for the last time, I could tell that she knew.
“You look beautiful,” I said, hopping over to fix her veil.
“You have to leave today, don’t you?” she said, quietly picking at her bouquet.
“I’m afraid so,” I said, “After today, you won’t need me anymore.”
“How do you know? What if I’m not ready? I’ve never been without you before,” she said.
“My job is over. I can only stay to protect and love you as long as you need me. Now you’ll have Andrew to do that. He’ll take care of you and love you more than even I could,” I said, “Don’t worry, you’re ready. If you weren’t I wouldn’t have to go.”
“But what will happen to you after you leave?” she said looking up to me for the first time during this conversation.
“I’ll always be with you Julie. And you’ll always be with me. The ones we love never leave us.”
“I love you, Gilly,” she whispered.
“I love you too, Julie,” I said giving her one last hug, “Now, you better get going. You have a groom waiting for you.”
She nodded and took her place, ready to walk down the aisle. I didn’t want to leave Julie, but it was time for me to go, and we both knew it. I was ready to go when I took my seat in the back of the church and as they said their “I do’s” I waved my final goodbye and disappeared.
When I opened my eyes I was in a nursery. And when I looked down into the crib I saw the same big sleepy brown eyes I had seen so many years before but the face in the crib had a different nose and different ears. I looked up to see the figure of a woman seated in a rocking chair reading a story to the baby. The face of the woman was a little more aged than I remembered but I would recognize her anywhere. Upon seeing me the baby had started to play with my big ears and laugh.
“Elizabeth, what’s so funny, baby girl?” Julie said, picking up her baby. She paused for a moment, and I’d like to think that in that moment she remembered all the times I had made her laugh just the same way. She had grown up to be such a wonderful mother. For all her fears and worries, she had become so much more than she ever thought she could.
Just then, Andrew walked in and said, “Hey, how are my two favorite girls doing?” And at that moment I took up my post to protect and love their little girl for as long as she needed me.