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The Lie and the Truth
Bright whites of winters past stare at me. Caves of long forgotten souls gape open and breath in the cool air. Trees moaning as their elders are cut down rustle softly atop its muscular back. Hard paws of ebony fire push me down towards the rocky and overdeveloped earth. It’s mind envelopes mine, and it sends me its message.
‘We are all slaves of humanity. Humanity is a slave to humanity. The ruler of humanity is a slave to its subjects. Do you hear their screams? Can you feel their pain? Of course you can’t. For you are the sedated slave. You see without truly seeing. You feel for pleasure, not for pain. You memorize, but don’t remember. You live, but only as if you were already dead. This is why you all must die. Do you realize that if you were meant to be the true rulers of this world you would live forever? Do you know what does live as long as this earth lives? I do. I live in the wind and the water, the sun, moon and stars… I live in everything except for you. The rocks live forever. So do the trees, the flowers, the streams, the fruits and the vegetables.
Everything on this planet shares one mind and lives forever except for all of you. You think that you are the invincable beings, while you are, in truth, the only ones who cease to exist after the carrier of your soul, your “body” I believe you call it, breaks down and dies the material death. You make up these ideas of heaven and hell, the afterlife, and of reincarnation. None if it will ever happen to a human as long as you are living as you are. You destroy the mind for simple pleasures, and that is why you can never be a part of the mind. Have you ever taken a moment to listen to the rays of the sun? To hear the pavement whisper to the road that they will be one in love forever? To see the hummingbird dance for the flower after stealing some of its nectar? To feel and see the waves of affection coming from the loved ones around you? You may think you have, at least once in your life, but you know deep inside that material body of yours that that is a lie. This whole life is a lie. You are born into the lie, you live the lie, and then you die the lie. Seeing me as I am now is a lie. Would you like to see me as the truth?’
“No. NO!”
It brought its storm closer to my face. The snow in its eyes were set a fire. The cave closed, but all of those souls seemed to only scream louder. Their way of escape that they never would have taken in the first place was closed once again.
‘I thought you would be different. It’s clear to me now that I was quite wrong. I can’t allow you to live this lie any longer. I was prepared to let you choose between the truth and the lie, but it is obvious that you are not strong enough for the truth. Die then, as a lie.’
It slowly brought its cave closer to my neck; ready to imprison another lost soul. Of its own cognition, as if in a daze, my hand found the 22 beneath my jacket. It fired directly in the middle of this one mind.
The storm grew suddenly limp across my shoulder. Looking into the dying swirls, I saw the fiery embers turn to cold ashes. The mourning trees ceased to cry out, for their mourning had ended in their own material deaths. The cold, hard, ebony became light and airy once more. I pushed the great creature off of my chest and slowly stood up. The storm had completely died out at this point, and all that was revealed was a large, black wolf. I looked at it a while longer, and then shrug my shoulders.
I pick up the great creature and laugh at it.
“Not so tough now, huh?”
I laugh still, even as I see the wolf everywhere I go. For in my gut, I know that I didn’t kill the wolf, it had killed me. It told me my truth where lies and my lies where the truth. In killing it I had killed myself. In letting it kill me I would have lived on… forever.
I set a small piece of the mind down in the meadow and I lie next to it. The trees rustle, but I cannot hear their anguish. The clouds move, but I cannot see their hatred of the sun. The maggots slowly eat the body of the great wolf, but I cannot feel them welcoming the great master back again.
And even as I cry tears of what I think is joy, I know that it’s all lies. This world, my world, is a lie.
Placing the gun into my mouth is the easiest thing in the world.
Pulling the trigger even easier.
I chose to die as a lie so I could contribute to the truth.
I lie next to the truth, close enough to feel it... But I feel it as a lie, and even the most beautiful lie cannot touch the most horrible truth.
I needed at least one truth in my life.
Death was the only truth left.
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This article has 4 comments.
The begging piece was: Stay With Me by Clint Mansell and Kronos Quartet
The ending piece was: Invocation by Constance Demby
Listen to them if you want and then maybe you'll understand.