There is a layer. Separating my body from my mind. It wasn’t there before and I noticed when it started. It stabs at me ever so often. I imagine this is how hermit crabs feel without their shells. Exposed and vulnerable to the world. Put on the spot but also unimportant. In my mind, this layer is flowy and sheer. It moves like a wave of glass. It sends shockwaves that paralyze my thoughts. Little sparks of outrage swim into my vision constantly. My brain did not create this layer naturally. If there wasn’t a layer I would have to accept that I’m currently under control. The public has total control over my body. But it doesn’t feel like that. My brain is beyond anyone's control and I have the freedom to think. In my brain, I’m in charge. So that’s why it's so difficult to reckon with the fact that my body does not have that control. It’s a tug of war with my body and so many others. Feeling like a sentient dog toy is a feeling I don’t enjoy. I never fully understood the privilege of bodily autonomy until it was threatened. Until I was shown how little women and people with uterus’s lives mean in this country. How we have less value than a group of cells. I am aware of how extremely privileged I am. I will be fine. But some people won’t be. So whoever sees this please do anything you can.