the
wallflower has left the building. and retreated home. where it's quiet.
actually i'm lying it's rather loud. i really was a wallflower, no
joke. everyone else were elephants, dracula, the joker, police officer,
gangster, from the 80's. where as i sat on the edge of the curly stairs
and guarded it from any couples wanting up to get it on. whew! i saved
many mistakes from happening, i'm sure. me, i've prevented plenty of
babies from coming unexpectedly. why am i such a mother to everyone?


high
school really is over-rated. and everyone who is sick of it will agree
to this because it's the truth. they dance we dance we dance we work up
a sweat in the living room. actually i'm lying i'm still sitting on the
side of twisty stairs. but i'm sure the host's baby pictures are
somewhere on the fireplace mantle. i search into my bag to get my
phone, even though it's pointless since i don't have texting anymore.
but i do anyways, as i lean against the wall, watching the crowd all do
some sort of new gangster move with their feet jumping off the floor
and down again. the repeat of equality slowly perverts into the
evening's real glow: darkness. darkness prevails. it always does.



my
friend, actually i'm lying my best friend wants to go upstairs with the
boy in the orange jumpsuit, her boyfriend. i really say no, i know what
he wants and he is so good and persuading and she is an expert at
lying. i refuse anymore silly nonsense. i do not let them through.
actually i'm lying when i got up to get a soda or something they snuck
upstairs.



noticing
their absence on the vintage couch, i am frightened. i panic. i run to
the boy in the pirate costume, hoarsely whispering in his ear what has
happened. he rushes upstairs, tightly gripping my hand, and he opens
all the doors, finally.... finding them in the bathroom. they are
surprised. i am surprised. actually i'm lying i'm not that surprised i
should've known better. everyone downstairs suddenly finds interest
in the current situation and decide to watch the scene, jaw-dropped
and eyes narrowing. lights, camera, action. then drama
drama drama. the boy in the pirate costume soon takes the role of
asking questions. i do also, and the lies begin. i listen and pretend
to understand and believe it and inside my guts are fighting a battle
whether to throw dinner at her slutty costume or not. i love my best
friend but i do not appreciate her dishonesty, or her disrespect to
behave so rudely at a party. she does not look in our eyes when
answering questions.



meanwhile,
the girls in the 80's are bogeying with the two new greek boys to
michael jackson. the dj knows how to play it loud so the whole
conversation is shouted. my heart is pounding, about to burst from my
chest, i hold it in, putting my hand where it belongs. the boy in the
pirate costume takes me downstairs, for a sip of "water", but who knows
what is really in the punch bowl, right? actually i'm lying i know it's
just punch. he asks me if i need a ride home and i insist that it's
fine and i apologize for being such a mother. but he stops me and
begins telling me how alright it is. who is he to say that it is
alright? he goes on, and on, and on. it's funny, because i do not hear
him. whenever he is telling me that he loves me and that i am such a
sweet person i blank out. it's like i must avoid it. strange.8



nope,
i've never been to a party like this. actually i'm lying i have before
it was at this boy's party where chaos occurred and before i knew it i
was offered brownies that smelled suspicious. it was quite the
experience.



lord,
i am not tempted to do anything i am uncomfortable with. i don't even
know why i went in the first place. the songs are all hyphy. the greek
boys only go for purple-eyed females. the light strobes are
inefficient. the adults are terribly drunk. rivals between couples are
ever-so-potential. secrets are spilt,, strong language is used, and i
am caught in the middle, only trying to stop. can't things just be
innocent and carefree for once? it's a halloween party!



so
i get to thinking why did i even go and then i think oh because i was
promised a good time. actually i'm lying i think i came because of the
boy in the pirate costume.