01/30/17 | Teen Ink

01/30/17

May 27, 2021
By Anonymous

Today was a normal day. I went to school, came home, went to practice and now I'm waiting for my mom to get home for dinner. My dad and I are watching our favorite show. We love watching wipeout. All we do is laugh at the people when they fall into the mud or water. He laughed as the person fell head first into the mud. Still laughing I say

 ¨ This is kinda sad they cant even make it past the first obstacle.¨ 

My mom finally gets home and we run over to get food. 

Later that night we went to bed. My dad works nights so before I go to bed I run up to him and give him a hug. I hate when he works nights. I don't get to see him when I wake up in the morning.

 ¨i love you¨ i say he says ¨ i love you too i'll see you in the tomorrow  princess.¨ 

For some odd reason I have a feeling that that won't happen but I ignore it for the time being. I run upstairs to watch Icarly before my mom tells me to go to bed. I finally fell asleep. It felt like I was laying there for hours trying to fall asleep but nothing seemed to work. I woke up a few hours later. It was 4:00. I still had 3 hours before I needed to be up for school. I decided to watch it icarly. Next thing I knew it was 7:00 I decided to get up and get ready for school. I picked out my outfit and put it on. I look in the mirror and I still can't shake the feeling that something is wrong. I go check on my mom and she seems fine, I go into my brother's room to see how he's doing and he's sleeping peacefully. I sat in his room for a minute. The only other person was my dad. I laugh . Why am I feeling like this? Everything is fine. I go back to my room and realize I still have time so I decide to sit on my phone on my bed. After about 20 minutes I got up and put my shoes on and grabbed my bookbag. I walk out the door and walk to the bus stop. I wait for the bus ofcourse my bus is late again when it is not. Finally 15 minutes later it shows up. I get on at the first stop so I walk to the back of the bus. I finally got to school. I rushed to my first class because i'm about to be late. Thankfully I got there on time, I had time to put my stuff away and get out my textbook and folder that I needed for Literacy, which is my first class. I'm walking in between the classrooms when I hear the phone ring. I laugh . The first period hasn't even started and someones going home lucky them. Mrs.Brown yells for me 

¨Scarlett!¨ 

I walked over to her. She smiles and says,

 ¨you're going home¨

 My heart drops. I give her a friendly smile and put my stuff in my bookbag and walk to the office. My mind starts wondering if something wrong is what i thought would happen, happening? I walk into the office and greet the Office ladies then I see my mom and we walk out together. She's wearing sunglasses and I can't see her eyes which makes me worry. I think to myself ¨mom never wears sunglasses inside she thinks people that do are annoying.¨ We walk out to the car without saying a single word i look in the car and see that my grandpa is driving and my brother is in the backseat that's when it hit me that he was gone. I don't know why I know but I do. I get in the car and we drive home without saying anything to each other. We finally arrived at my grandparents house. My mom tells me and my brother to sit on the couch. I don't cry around other people of the years. I've gotten really good at holding everything in and not letting anyone see any of my emotions and sometimes I worry that I just don't feel them anymore. My mom finally took off her glasses. I could tell she had been crying. I grab my brother's hand to maybe prepare him or maybe even myself. I hear my grandma crying and even my grandpa had never seen him cry but I guess there's a first for everything. My mom looks at me and says

¨your dad died at work today.¨

I didn't know what to say, my brother immediately started crying but i didn't know what to say for some sick reason i thought it was a joke. I didn't know where to look, my hands were shaking. I let a tear go, My mom hugged my brother and I. I just wanted to go home.

Two weeks later

My uncle and grandma and grandpa flew in from California for the funeral. My uncle stayed at our house. He didn't bring up the fact that I barely cried but my mom did. It was like she wanted me to break down and cry for hours. Which i would have if i could have but i didn't know how. We had to get ready for the funeral and get to see him one last time. I put on my black dress. I hated dresses but for my dad I would do anything. When everyone was finally ready we all piled into the car no one said a word on the way there, there was quiet crying from all corners of the car and my uncle patted my mom on the shoulder every couple of seconds. We got to the funeral home and we walked in, We all sat down in the front row, i didn't know what to think i just sat there as people walked by us and said how sorry they are as if it was there doing. It was time to walk up to the casket. My mom went first then my uncle then me i didn't know what to say it not like it was actually him, my father was gone his spirit was gone. The person in front of me wore my dad's face but he didn't have the same charm. I missed his smile. I would do anything to see it one more time. After everyone was done saying what they wanted, we left for the cemetery.

My mom looked at me and said, ``How are you doing.¨

Honestly i don't know what to say to that so i stuck with 

¨Ïm fine.¨

She smiled.

We got the cemetery the priest stood at the front of everyone and read from the bible honestly i thought everything he was saying was stupid if god was so good why would he take my dad, my bestfriend he was the most caring person you would have ever met and in the blink of an eye he was gone. When we were finally done everyone told my mom how beautiful it was. We went out to eat at his favorite place Red Robin i want hungry but i didn't want my mom to worry. I ordered my dad's favorite burger. I ate some of it but mostly waited for everyone else to be done. When we were finally home I told everyone I was tired and went to bed. I didn't sleep but I needed a break from everyone. 

From this experience I learned to hold on to your loved ones with everything you have. Tell them you love them and mean it everytime. I learned that family goes deeper than blood especially after I saw who actually cared, who showed up to the funeral or who texted or called who flew down.   


 


The author's comments:

This peice is about the death of my bestifriend. Make sure you hold on to the people you love because there all you have.


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