“Deep breaths bud, don’t worry about it you will get it down it just takes time.” Cousin Ben would say in a gentle comforting voice.

Time after time I would cause a problem while throwing, and time after time I would get down on myself. This would ruin the whole system we had together and each and every time he would find a way to relax me. Whether it would be telling me a joke or a story about his college life, it would all help and he knew it. It was like he had been through it all with me. Knowing it all, he would coach me step by step.

“Hey Susie how about you relax and throw the ball don’t aim, just throw it” He would say in a joking manner.

After every funny remark like that I would throw a perfect ball. It would just put me in a good place mentally. After throwing a good ball it was like a domino theory and everything would eventually fall into place. The advice he gave, whether it was in person on the phone or even over email was like gold to me. I could take everything he said and out it into my play on the field and off. The ideas he has given me for calming down and gaining composure have helped me countless times in school and out in my life.

“Football is a game in the present, not the past and you always need to focus on what’s at hand not what is behind you” He says with his father like voice.

This not only helps me on the field, but it also comes out into my life and helps me move on when something goes wrong whether it be homework, a test, or even just a normal day when I screw up. He is the kind of guy that everyone enjoys being around at all times.

Not only did he give me advice to take onto the field, but also to take into life. Just watching him do anything was good for me, whether it was watching him play football in college or just watching him carry himself around others. Last summer, my girlfriend and I were at a big family party for my Uncle Tommy (Ben’s dad). As the night grew older we decided it was time to leave. As we got closer to the car we began to split and maneuver our selves around the car to our doors.

Just as I was about to open my door he screeched across the parking lot “You going to open the door for her you little jerk?”

Knowing that he was joking I laughed about it, but ever since then I have always opened the door for her when possible. This personal mannerism has gained me more respect from her, my family, and her family. His presence brightens every situation. I know that no matter what the situation is I can go to him and talk about it. Without him I do not think I would have been able to make it through my Grandma’s death or getting kicked out of school. No matter what, he found a way to be there for me when I needed someone more then ever. It was great knowing that I did not have to search like a dog to find an honest and caring person that would be there for me.


After my Grandma passed away he called me and said with a somber voice, “Hey bud how are you doing? Everything will be okay and we are all going to be together soon so do whatever you can to stay strong and help your parents. Also know that you can call me whenever you need to, no matter what it is you want to talk about”

This by itself helped me a significant amount with the pain and suffering I was dealing with, because I knew that there was someone to talk to at all times. His characteristics are some that are a rarity in today’s society. Virtually perfect, his willingness to help anyone will never stop. Throughout life there are many times that everyone will need to talk to someone and that person should be one that is trustworthy. My cousin Ben is the one that I trust with anything that I have to tell him. He is my vault and I put my issues and problems inside of him and I know that they will always be safe no matter what.