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Cease To Exist
I called out her name. “Macky!” She turned around as her hair just above shoulder length followed. “What?” “Hi!” I replied. She smiled and waved back. She had one of those smiles that could make the rest of the world smile back. I loved her beautiful smile.
I knew Macky was gone, yet I still couldn’t believe it. It was just a few hours ago when I talked to her last, just a few hours ago when I saw her. I couldn’t absorb it. I wouldn’t even try. I couldn’t bare the thought of Macky not being there.
Tuesday finally came along. As I walked into the band room, I plopped my self down. Suddenly realizing the counselor and principal were pacing nervously. We were all settled in as a band, looking forward, waiting for their mouths to open, waiting for words to come out.
“Macky passed away Friday.” Mr. Hull said. I knew this already, but still zoned out in shock. My mind was racing. Processing it all. I knew it were true, why was it now when I started to realize it? I look up, not realizing I’m wiping tears from my face, as they slowly roll down, as they hit the floor. I just wipe them away. “There will be a funeral, but arrangements are still being made.” I missed everything that he said, but I knew the story already.
I looked up from my chair, and towards Macky’s old chair. Where she would always sit, just a few feet away from me. She wasn’t there. She would never be there again. That’s the moment when I truly accepted that my best friend was gone. My favorite place to look at, the place that held memories. Where we would gaze at each other with nothing to say, so we would just sit there smiling at each other.
I didn’t know why this was my favorite place for a while, but I now know why. It is not my favorite place because Macky sat there, but the memories we shared there, and when I accepted her death. It is where I had closure. Where I realized she was gone forever. That she would never come back.
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