You never know what you have until it’s gone. I was careless. I took things for granted. I thought my family would always be there. I would rather be with my friends, because I grew up believing my family would be there whenever I needed them or wanted them to be. The year of 2005, changed my outlook on everything.

My family is not the easiest scenario to explain. It’s verbally and emotionally mind straining. My mom and my dad split up I was very young. My mom was addicted to pain pills, alcohol, and god knows what else. So I’ve always lived with my father. Don’t get me wrong that was just as bad as living with my mom in some ways. His anger was out of control. He’d snap over the littlest things. I’d be scared for him to come home from work just because I knew it was going to be hell. It never changed.

Not long after the separation he found someone new. She wasn’t the most motherly type of step-mom; however she was the everyday women figure all young girls needed in their life. It was my dad,Melissa,Zach,and BaiLee. Zach is my older brother, and BaiLee is my baby sister. It was a happy situation, for awhile.

BaiLee wasn’t my blood, but her mom, Melissa, and my dad got together when she was only a few months old. We were all she knew. We were her family. Blood couldn’t have brought us any closer. Sometimes I felt as if I was her mother. I bathed her. I got her ready for school. I read to her before bed. I took her to the park. Where ever I went, she had to go too. At the time I hated it, but now I would do anything to be able to see her again.

My dad and Melissa were together for almost seven years. They fought but I didn't think it was anymore then other parents and they always made up. I never thought their arguments would turn into anything more then that. But I was only twelve, what did I know?

I started hearing rumors. A friend from school started asking, “Why was Melissa's car at my neibors house last night?" and "Whys your step mom always with that guy?" I would try to brush it off and ignore it but inside the thoughts slowly ate away at my heart. The fear of the truth raced through my little pea sized brain

The fights started getting worse. On night she sat me down to talk. We sat in a swing chair. It was dark with only the moons and a dimmed porch light lighting the area. She started promising no matter what happened between her and my dad that she would never walk out of my life like so many other people had already done/ Stupid ignorant me just let it be and said okay. I didn't know much but I knew that it couldn't be good. Not to long after that conversation, the fight of all fights broke out.

Watching my dad throw everything in his reach onto the kitchen floor. I grabbed my baby sister and ran into our room. We sat on the bottom bunk. Holding her tight, covering her ears tried to ignore the sound of their yelling and crashing of what sounded to be glass and other heavy objects hitting the floor. I held her tight on my tiny lap as tears ran down our cheeks. "Make mommy and daddy stop!" I was only twelve, what was I suppose to do? There was something about this argument that just wasn’t the same as all the rest.

Melissa and BaiLee both left that day, and so did my childhood. I never knew how much the human mind could mature in just a matter of hours. As days turned into weeks, reality hit me. They weren't coming back.

My sister still went to my school though. She was in the first grade. Everyday after class I would go see her at the after school program. I can remember how her eyes lit up every time I walked through those double doors. She would cry, “When can I come home? Where’s brother? Where’s daddy? I'm tired of sleeping at uncles. Mommy hasn’t picked me up yet."

The story I was told was that Melissa dropper her off there after leaving our house that day and just never went back. How low can you get? After a few months my sister just went to Texas to live with her grandparents. It was probably for the best. Her grandparents were the second set of people closest to being her parents. They were really close. And they could give her a good home. However I want to be selfish. I want my baby sister here with me. With us. With her family. Five years without a single word, and I miss her more and more everyday.

As time goes by, open wounds heal. But there will always be a part of my heart missing because she's not here with me. As I’ve grown, I’ve learned a very important lesson. Time is precious. It is something that is to be deeply cherished because once it’s over; there is no way to get it back.