Child. Teenager. Adult. That's the process one goes through in a lifetime. But in that process, one aspect might affect another. A goofy kid can become a funny teen. A teenager that's strong-willed can translate into an adult that believes. So much happens on the road to being an adult, some of it truly wonderful and some of it truly horrible. As people we can all reflect on moments that made us who we are now. Moments that never leave us, not even for a second. In about 3 weeks, I will be a senior in high school and in a matter of months I'll be 18. As I take my first steps toward adulthood, I feel it's important to look at the crucial moments in my life with a different light, and see how they made me who I am.

I always thought that my passion for writing grew in high school, but as I looked through old journals and diaries, I realize writing has been apart of me my entire life. But I didn't realize it until I was older. There's something so wonderful and so poignant about going through relics of your childhood as a teenager. The things you liked, and the things you did are all cringe-worthy. As I read through an old diary that I kept from the 5th grade to about 7th grade, I saw a lot of the same insecurities that I have now, were bigger back then. 10 year old me was an awkward black girl and unfortunately that didn't track the nicest people. Middle school was tougher because at that point puberty struck and I wasn't pretty like the other girls. My classmates gave me a hard time about that and be a I wasn't into the same things they were. I hid the features of myself that make me the person I am, because I wanted to fit in, but more importantly I did not want to be ostracized by everyone because that meant I would be alone. And after my parents decided to split up, I felt a chill of loneliness everywhere I went.

But it was in middle school that I met my best friend Divine, who showed me that I was meant to be an individual. But that part of me was still cut off and when I linked up with the friends I made in high school that part came out more and more, to the point where it's now this wonderful part of me. I'm an awkward black girl, and like Issa Rae I'm going to embrace it. Yes, I think books are the most wonderful thing to ever happen and yes I do dance awkwardly but at least it's mine and mine alone. I'm stubborn like the mountain, and I'm beautiful like the stars. I'm sorry that my younger self had to endure so much, but in the past eight years I realized great individuals often have to suffer on their paths to success and I plan to do great things with my life, starting now.