Dear Diary,

 I have come to know you very well. You are the only one who I can be completely honest with anymore. You dont say anything ... Im glad you just let me write down my feelings.

Im sick of this world. It feels as if Im only living to please others. I can never be truly happy. Dont know who to trust anymore ... everyone says they want what is best for me but thats what they think. not me. I want to be myself and go on adventures. I want to leave and honestly .. never return. I want to start my own.

Ive been thinking of gettin some money together and pack up one night and leaving. Yes, I do not want to hurt anyone. But I cant help what I feel. I dont feel at home here anymore. Nothing makes sense. Im lost. Im alone.

 I wish I could just go into my wonderful place ( my dreams). They are the only things making any sense right now. Im happy there. Im with him and no one is telling me to leave him. Everyone has thier own thing and I love how they are not all in my bussiness trying to force me to do what they "think is best." Gosh how I hate that.

So there you know a bit about how Im feeling in my "little mess" ( thats what I call it now). Till next time.

     Love, 
               Her.