I’m the only one who looks at that boy the way I do. With disbelieving stars in my eyes and an untameable smirk on my face. Why I’m the only one completely taken with him is a puzzle in my mind that I don’t bother turning over. Because with this intense puppy love, it’s also a relief that no one else is vying for his dear, dreamy, halo bordered face. The one sprinkled with little brown bits of star dust.

My number two crush after Matthew Mcconaughey, which is the best I can do with this untouched grade ten meat in my chest.

And oh my god, I feel dumb when I think about him. Like, really, cute leg hairs? Who thinks about things like that?! But then I do think about it ,and it makes perfect sense. I can say with the most certainty I’ve ever felt, that of course, he has the cutest leg hairs ever. Duh!

And maybe he knows, he probably knows, how could he not know? Every time I see him in the halls, I break my neck turning away, because I know that I can’t help from staring. I mean, I’d count the freckles on his face, purposefully lose count, and start again just to trace and retrace the contours around those brown eyes.

I almost talked to him yesterday. The opportunity was there, one pace away on the sidewalk ahead. A hop, skip and a jump away from an almost maybe, “ummm, hi.” But I retreaded, with the butterflies in my stomach flying up to the back of my throat, bringing lunch with them. So I kept walking behind him, staring at the hands that I wish could hold… and then break apart from because it’s warm out, and I’m nervous and they’re getting sweaty and I don’t want him to be grossed out. So I’m lying awake, convincing myself that I don’t really like him that much, and I barely know him, he could by a serial killer. A really adorable serial killer. No, of course I don’t really feel this way.

But then I see him after school and my heart detaches itself from it’s valves, does fifty jumping jacks, runs a lap through my body and returns. It tells me about how cute his leg hairs are, and reminds me that I’d count every one his freckles. More than once.