It was a beautiful day at Community Field. The varsity baseball team was up against a tough conference opponent in Central Dauphin. We fell behind early when they plated two runs in the first inning. I came to the plate with my aggressive mentality and struck out swinging at three straight pitches. Although I didn’t put the ball in play, I still felt good. It seemed like only a few minutes later I was up at the plate again ready to redeem myself for what some say is an unproductive at bat. The first pitch came in. Ball one. Now I was looking for my pitch and that’s exactly what I got. It was a big meaty fastball about knee high. My eyes grew bigger as it came in and I connected with the ball perfectly. It sailed to a place that should’ve been over the fence, but we do not have one at our field. The JV game, being played had to stop playing because it was in the middle of their outfield. I rounded first base pretty heavily because I knew it would be more than a double. Accelerating around second base, their outfielders still hadn’t reached the ball yet. Coach was waving me home as I approached third. As I rounded the base, I could feel something peculiar with my running. I hit a divot in the ground and stepped in a weird way. I pushed through and dove across home plate for my first ever varsity homerun.

After that hit, nothing felt the same. I pushed through a few more innings in the field until I couldn’t take the pain anymore. Thankfully, I had done enough damage with my homerun to propel us to victory and clinching the Mid-Penn Commonwealth division. The regular season was then over, but we still had to compete in the Mid-Penn playoffs to compete for the best team in our division.

I was still feeling this constant nagging in my hip that wouldn’t go away. I had gone to the trainers to get it wrapped, so I could still play in that game. However, I would soon be regretting my decision to play. The competitor in me just couldn’t pass up playing in this game. I took batting practice and felt fine. I did my regular pre-game sprints and the wrap made it seem like nothing had ever happened with my hip.

It was now game time. I promised myself before the game that I wouldn’t push myself because I couldn’t risk any injuries. I was hitting second and I was mentally preparing myself to hit. Anything I put in the outfield, I could simply jog to first without any risks. Unfortunately, i grounded a ball up the middle that the second baseman backhanded. The inner-competitor came out in me again and I flew to first. I had it beat out and one step before the base it felt like my whole hip came detached from my body. I stumbled across the base safely, but was instantly in grieving pain. My teammates came over to help me off the field. If I put any pressure or tried to move my leg, it felt like someone was twisting a knife deeper into it. I instantly regretted my decision to play. I sat down on the bench with a numbing pain that travelled from my waist to my pinky toe in my right leg. I began to think of the worst: torn muscle, snapped ligament, hip out of the socket, broken bone. The feeling of sickness then settled in and I felt like I was going to vomit any second.

The trainer there came in and tried to help, but she honestly had no idea what she was doing. Thankfully, having a dad as a doctor, I called him from within the dugout. He had no idea what to think. He was just in complete awe that I had gotten injured.

My team needed me for district and state playoffs later and I let them down by getting hurt. The game I got injured in would turn out to not matter anyway because we lost. I didn’t go to see a doctor for five weeks after the injury. In the time between, I was limping around school because I have too much pride within myself to use crutches. I didn’t want to attract any attention to it because I hate to talk about it. I hate not being able to help my team. I was, at that point, useless.

Districts came along. I wasn’t able to play in either of the two games. They were closer games than they should’ve been, but we squeaked them out to come up with a district title for the second year in a row. Next, was the first round of states. We were slotted to play a conference rival, Red Land. I could walk normally by this game, but running was going to hurt if I tried. I could have probably hit if I wanted to, but the competitor inside me wouldn’t let me take it easy running, so I decided to sit out of the game. I know now that it was the right choice. We ended up losing that game because our offense was not producing runs.

All I can think of now is what could have happened if I was playing. What could have happened if I never got hurt? What could have happened if I never pushed myself to my injury? Those are just a few questions I have been asking myself lately, but I am healing still and it is affecting my summer travel baseball plans. I have a pro baseball showcase next week and I am still debating whether I go or not. It is one of the biggest events I will ever play in and it sucks not being able to participate in it. This is my year to get recruited, so I need to stay healthy and get in front of college coaches as fast as I can. I have learned from this experience that pushing my body to the limits is never the right option. I never have realized how much I use different parts of my body until they are injured. I will always be on the more cautious side when I play because harming myself will not be an option later in my baseball career.