10 Easy ways to talk to the female kind. 

1.Whenever they are going through emotional distress, ask offensive questions like: “Oh my god- are you on your period?” or, “You’re so hot when you're mad.” This invalidates their feelings, and they will at once falter under your power. 

2.Never ever ask them for their opinion. They will ramble on about how you shouldn't do this or shouldn't do that because it's “a jerk move”. Instead, do it anyway and verbally abuse them when they speak up about it. If you accidentally treat them like a normal person, act annoyed, uninterested, or make offensive and rude faces until they feel unwanted and shut up. 

3.Consent is disgusting. It's so unattractive and you're a weak beta male if you ask if they want or like what you're doing. To completely enamor them, touch them inappropriately and brag about it to your friends.  

4. If they ever decide to play hard to get and report you to the police, blame the clothes or lack of. Obviously, they wouldn't be wearing shorts in the middle of summer if they weren't looking to get groped. It's their fault for wanting to dress in a way that makes them happy. 

Stalking is the hottest thing ever. You see them walking alone by themselves? Cross that street king! Follow her home to get her attention, even bring a couple buddies along. Sharing is caring. 

5.Did she have the audacity to say no? Intimidate them by yelling, shaking your fists, mocking what they're wearing. This shows dominance and intelligence. It also lets other male specimens know they aren't as breedable as they look. 

6.Finally land a smoking babe? Well, there's no reason to be romantic or kind anymore. They're going to stay with you forever! If they get mad while in the relationship, don't listen to what they're saying, instead get them material things to push the problem off till later. 
You are the head of the household.

7.Any man that gets anywhere near the woman you're interested in is a pervert. They need to drop all their friends and only interact with you.  

8.Trust is a thing of fairytales and cringey sports movies. They should tag you in every single post. If you don't have all their personal information they're cheating. Don't be naïve, when they complimented that one guy's shirt they were obviously looking to cheat.  

9.If you aren't talking crap about them behind their back, it's not a stable relationship. 

10. Stalking is the hottest thing ever. You see them walking alone by themselves? Cross that street king! Follow her home to get her attention, even bring a couple buddies along. Sharing is caring.