I know you didn’t ask for pollution or climate change. You never want any responsibility. You say you’re all just “trying to make it” and no one really has time to be concerned for anyone but themselves. But then, who expected you to be able to keep it together? Not your parents, who always told you how irresponsible you were, not your teachers, who were constantly on you for not getting your homework done in time, and definitely not your sister, who still won’t talk to you after you ruined her favorite sweater. Yet here we are. You insisted you could take care of the planet and now there’s so much trash in the ocean, we can all walk on water!

Other than turning off the water while brushing your teeth and shopping at thrift stores, you’ve really treated this planet like crap. We can’t ignore the countless plastic bottles in your room, the fact that you couldn’t carpool to school because you’d have to wake up 15 minutes earlier, or your detestation of paper straws. And now saving the planet will certainly be an uphill battle.

You probably should have formed some eco-friendly habits at an earlier age. When you suggested to your parents at age 12 that you can’t walk the six blocks to school when they were trying to cut down on the family’s air pollution, the conversation likely should have gone further than their deciding it’s easier to just drive you than argue about it. I don’t know how anyone can be surprised now that you work at the same place as your roommate and still refuse to drive to work together, which would cut your air pollution in half. Who would have thought that your parents’ lack of discipline with you would lead to your being an irresponsible and negligent adult? Shocking.  

Since littering, not recycling, and over-watering grass have become so normal, it’s hard to tell if you’ll ever change. But considering the state of the planet now, maybe, just maybe, you could consider changing your bad habits.  You should, by the age of 18, know to recycle your cans and jars when you’re done with them.

After all the focus for almost three years on a global pandemic, you may have thought that your bad habits didn’t matter or that everyone else had picked up your slack. While COVID-19 did help to improve the environment, you can’t just use this as a “fresh start.” Who would have thought it’d only take a global pandemic and restrictions put in place by the government to force some change on the population? The positive impacts of the pandemic can even be seen via satellite images from space. Nitrogen dioxide emissions are air pollutants created by factory output and vehicles. Since factory production and vehicle travel had essentially ended, the “cloud” of nitrogen dioxide that covered China before the pandemic has greatly disappeared. We are still worlds behind where we should be as a population. It will take more than just a few months of being locked up to reclaim our air.  

Congrats! You were forced to improve your environmental habits by the government, but you didn’t use any of your new habits after the pandemic. You went back to using single-use plastic (almost more than ever!) to reduce cross-contamination, putting us right back where we were, as concerned as ever.

Now, 25 trillion Styrofoam cups are thrown out every year by Americans, and 78% of marine animals are at risk of choking on plastic. I just know that somehow, with your ability to never take responsibility for your actions, you’ll be able to talk yourself out of being blamed for this.

Sincerely, 

Planet Earth

Your home for the past 18 years, the rest of your life, and all future generations