All Nonfiction
- Bullying
- Books
- Academic
- Author Interviews
- Celebrity interviews
- College Articles
- College Essays
- Educator of the Year
- Heroes
- Interviews
- Memoir
- Personal Experience
- Sports
- Travel & Culture
All Opinions
- Bullying
- Current Events / Politics
- Discrimination
- Drugs / Alcohol / Smoking
- Entertainment / Celebrities
- Environment
- Love / Relationships
- Movies / Music / TV
- Pop Culture / Trends
- School / College
- Social Issues / Civics
- Spirituality / Religion
- Sports / Hobbies
All Hot Topics
- Bullying
- Community Service
- Environment
- Health
- Letters to the Editor
- Pride & Prejudice
- What Matters
- Back
Summer Guide
- Program Links
- Program Reviews
- Back
College Guide
- College Links
- College Reviews
- College Essays
- College Articles
- Back
President Obama Endorses Air As Human Necessity, GOP Revolts
WASHINGTON D.C.—In a statement made at a White House press conference early Friday morning, President Barack Obama announced his support of air as a human necessity.
“I think air is (uhh) something that all people need,” President Obama said. “Not only is air (uhhh) useful, and pretty cool, but I think it’s (long pause) sort of a human necessity. We thrive better when we all have air.”
Furthermore, the president wishes to see Congress take action on ensuring everyone has equal access to air.
“When people don’t have air, they tend to become deceased, and pretty quickly too. I imagine that if Congress passed a law making sure everyone had access to that human necessity, air, we’d have a lot less people (uhh) dying,” the president claimed.
But in endorsing air, the president ignited a firestorm within the GOP. In a coalition led by Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell and House Speaker John Boehner, 11 Senate and 220 House Republicans have threatened to revolt and boycott air altogether.
In a statement released by McConnell, he said “We refuse to let the president push his administration's liberal agenda on the legislative branch. In the event that the president pursues his endorsement via executive order, the members of Congress aligned in our recent agreement will refuse to take in any air.”
Other right-wing politicians such as presidential hopeful Ted Cruz have already taken to social media to blast the president for his endorsement; in many cases, the GOP has taken some more radical measures in protest.
“Make no mistake: air is like Obamacare for the atmosphere,” Cruz tweeted to his 423 followers shortly after Obama’s announcement. “The government is making a concerted effort to eliminate freedom by forcing us to use air. They want to eliminate the promise of America.”
Other Republicans have expressed their concern more abrasively. In fact, President Obama’s announcement sparked such a reaction that conservative pundit Ann Coulter’s has already been hospitalized due to near suffocation.
“The president’s remarks made Ann very emotional, and she felt the best way to stand up for Americans was to simply stop taking in oxygen,” Coulter’s spokesman posted. “She’s asking everyone to pray for her.”
Similar Articles
JOIN THE DISCUSSION
This article has 0 comments.