There was a time when all the following were true: Inside jokes between friends came from real moments and conversations, not 6 second Vines. High school sweethearts met in math class, or by bumping into each other in the hallways, not by someone tossing the add on Snapchat. Dinners with friends and parties did not revolve around updating the highlight reels on Instagram and VSCO. Reverse all of those statements and that’s what its like to be a teenager in the 21st century. Our understanding of what it means to be a friend is knowing someone’s texting patterns, rather than the nuances in their facial expressions.
   

Social media allows us to have a constant, yet fabricated presence in each others lives. Hanging out with a friend now means hanging out with all of their contacts too, as they spend the entire day with their thumbs glued to a screen. Always anticipating the next ring and bing from our phones, we no longer focus on who is in front of us, but rather who is not. More attention is put into making a great snapchat than actually making memories and conversation with the people you are with.
   

Apps such as Facebook, Snapchat, Instagram, and VSCO shift the focus from what your doing to who's seeing it. The moment and memory are overshadowed by how many likes the picture got. The funny joke your friend told is only funny if over 100 people watched the Snap story. The validation we receive from social media is tangible in a way that is easy to process, and publicize, causing teenagers to crave it. A false sense of importance is added to the comforting clicks of approval.
   

 We think the likes, comments, and snaps are grand gestures of love and care, but really, they are simply habits. Habits we hope have meaning, because they have become our default communication with each other. The value placed on a tap or slide on a screen is disproportionate to what these  gestures would equate to in a face to face conversation. A like on a profile picture probably means your hair looks nice, not someone wants to date you. Posting an Instagram picture with someone does not make them your best friend. With these slight, effortless gestures carrying lots of weight in our day to day lives, we are unfamiliar with the scale face to face communication operates on.
     

As the security of a screen fades away during a face to face conversation, our generation stands uncomfortable and unprepared. We have learned to apply the idea of adding a filter to all aspects of our lives, and face to face communication does not allow for the control and hiding our generation has grown accustomed to. Our discomfort with face to face conversation leads us to struggle with it. Compare the hand shake of the boy sitting next to you with your dad’s, theres the problem right there. We are unable to convey confidence and sense of self without the protection of the delete button.
     

The genuine emotion and subtleties a face to face interaction provides disorients many teenagers, making texting and social media more attractive forms of communicating. A good conversation becomes a rarity, as the phones won’t stay away long enough for the true emotions to come out.