Everyone has an individual in their lives who refuses to communicate. No matter how many texts, emails, or calls they receive, responding to any of them seems to be a great hurdle to jump. To us, it doesn't seem too hard to look at your phone and check any new developments that have occurred and commit to a response; checking our phones is almost a natural habit, seeing as so many of us these days are so attached to them, like a dear friend that we fear losing sight of. How is it possible, then, for these people to see the vast amounts of activity and not take the time to formulate a response?

The people we talk to have lives too of course; whether it be work, social responsibilities, etc. they still need to tend to things outside of us. Though what we might want to talk about might be a first priority at the moment, to them it might not seem as such. Not only that, but some people just aren’t as attached to their electronics such as the IPhone or Samsung Galaxies as most of us are. After a day of no feedback, we can dismiss the oversight on their part, and simply attempt to ask again. But after a week with no reply, something out of the ordinary is often suspected. Are they ignoring you? Do you have the wrong number?

Now these questions are the kind of questions that a paranoid individual might ask themselves, but we can’t help but ponder over the things that could be keeping them from answering, the things that cause the silence from the other end of the line. It might simply be that they read the text (or email etc.) and forgot about it, dismissed it as something to attend to at a later date. It might have been a trivial tidbit of information in their otherwise busy lives that they believe they can forget with no consequence. We as individuals have no way of knowing unless the person finally decides to answer, whether it be hours, days, or even weeks later. Though it might be an inconvenience to us, we cannot fault them for their moderate lack of diligence, can we?

But there is a point. A point in which the silence is deafening, the need for an answer is urgent, and the lack of communication becomes a hindrance, a new hurdle for us to jump over ourselves. The task of putting the effort into getting something cohesive from these types of individuals becomes a frustrating dance of push and pull, a system that demands that you give but they never give back. It’s draining. The point is there, when the frustration builds to a peak so that all of this effort doesn’t seem worth it, where the climb had no merit in the end.

And this frustration, confusion, desperation, is what they don’t understand. The reason that we push and push for a response is to produce a result; whether it’s urgent or not, it has a purpose. It is relevant to us; though it may seem trivial to them, it would make a difference if they would try to keep in touch every once in a while. We are not demanding an immediate response. Just one that comes instead of one that leaves us waiting in the shadows.

One thing that grates on my nerves, though, is when the lack of communication is caused by a souring relationship. As a child dealing with divorced parents, communication between the two was often passed through me. And now, with the majority of my time spent at my mother’s house, getting my father to answer any of my mother’s or my own texts and emails has become more of a chore than anything else. Often times, I have become the mediator between the two, getting passed back and forth with differing opinions to relay, mixed in with my own insight of the situation to try to move the conversation along. These instances can take weeks, even months to resolve. But this situation could be easily rectified if they would simply talk.
There is no need for such a bitter relationship to cause so many rifts in communication. I have observed that, from years of experience with my parents, considerate communication is necessary. Once you consider the needs of the other person instead of your own, more understanding and fruitful conversations can develop, with less brackishness emerging from the contact made. Plans can be finalized, questions answered, relationships healed; all because of a quick response that is worth the effort put into it. If we take the five minutes needed to respond to those who call on us, immense possibilities of connections and solutions can be made.