Sand | Teen Ink
  1. Home
  2. Poetry
  3. Sand

Sand

November 29, 2008
By Anonymous

I'm knee deep in water,
My eyes and face turned to the sky.
Larks, sparrows, finches, doves.
I wish I could fly like them.

I did once, I could fly.
But I gave up my wings,
and I gave up my heart.
Both now fly alone.

I can feel the water retreat.
It's suddle song, and
It's soft angels.
I watch my last compaions flee.

I stand alone,
Knee deep in sand.
Angels, clowns, lions, swords.
They've all gone away...

I did once...
And now I'm sinking in sand,
sufficating on my mistakes.

© Anonymous

Post a comment
Submit your own

Similar Articles

Previous Next
Poetry
Our Soldiers
By Anonymous
Poetry
Outside my Window
By Anonymous
Poetry
Baseball
By Anonymous
Poetry
cell phone in class
By Anonymous
Poetry
The Child
By Anonymous
Poetry
Athena
By Anonymous

JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 8 comments.

kiwi12 PLATINUM said...
on Aug. 11 2009 at 12:20 am
kiwi12 PLATINUM, Austin, Texas
28 articles 10 photos 365 comments
View profile
I like it much. and as for exaggeration, it helps sometimes to picture the poem better.
ElizabethS. said...
on Jan. 24 2009 at 3:58 am
This was nice, but the spelling mistakes really take away from the flow of the poem. Check "subtle", "companions", and "suffocating".
sarahweis said...
on Jan. 19 2009 at 2:13 am
i liked it. beautiful :)

though it is suffocating not suffication...just for future reference. still wonderful :)
F'donkadonk said...
on Jan. 18 2009 at 12:19 am
I enjoyed reading that, and thought that your poem was one big metaphor overall.

"I did once, I could fly. But I gave up my wings, and I gave up my heart." That little section was nice :)
Joespheind123 said...
on Jan. 16 2009 at 9:40 pm
I think that this poem was very deep and mystery like. I wish I knew what was going on in the authers head as he/she wrote the poem.
Michelle Saucier said...
on Dec. 29 2008 at 8:21 pm
I liked it. I don't know what's wrong with it, but I do like it. I'm a picky reader also, so I hope this encourages you.
BellaCullen95 said...
on Dec. 16 2008 at 6:51 pm
I think the poem was alright to a point. Angels, clowns, lions, swords, what in the world does that mean? Apart from that though, it's a great piece.
Redemption65 said...
on Dec. 14 2008 at 8:43 pm
Now, we all like to read imagery, but this is absurd. "I stand alone, knee deep in sand" is a exaggeration, and I believe imagery that is exaggerated is as horrible as a cliche.