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for carla
her hands shake like leaves in a storm
as the smoke coils around her
a python
waiting to leap
not yet
no, not yet.
13 years old
too young to die
chalk blue hair framing her young, young face
the baby of the group
always smiling
not fake, not hiding anything
a real smile.
the smile of someone who is loved
as she is
as she always will be
but when the laughter quietens
and she refuses my coat
my heart breaks a little.
i need her
safe
whole
keep her that way.

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her name is carla. she didnt hesitate. she never does. and she loves all of those she never hesitated to let in with everything she has. i owe her my life