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Hornets Nest
Sometimes I'm scared of heights
and therefore, sometimes climbing trees
I'm scared of hornets and beetles that bite
but I like every other bug, including bees
I'm scared of dark, small spaces
like my closet or the bead room
and going alone to places
or telling my parents what I'll have to tell them soon
I'm scared of dreaming
mostly nightmares, but others as well
A little bit of swinging
scared I'll throw the bat or miss the ball
I'm scared of falling in love
placing my still beating heart in a stranger's hands
Funny how these are the things I run towards most -
I'm scared of heights but I love the fall
And I'll climb every tree I see
I broke a hornet's nest with a rubber ball
did it to not one or two, but three
When I was trying to keep myself from suicide
I crawled into my closet just to stay alive
and I plan on going to pride
then coming out to my parents and hope I survive
I spend much of my sleep and most of my wakefulness
dreaming instead of doing my work
And I wish we would work on offense more and defense less
to keep myself calm I have to drive my feet into the dirt
But I'm still duct-tape proofing my heart from the outside world
My blood runs dry but at least I'm safe
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