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Deaths Leftovers
The first crack, that nailed into my tiny glass bottle -
11 years ago, you died, and you were only 25
And I was only 4
You were a daughter to my mother
A glimmering shard in a grave of broken mirrors -
If I met you, I would've considered you my sister.
Your open casket, dark mahogany, scratched with maple scars
Momma held my tiny little hand in her quivering cold grasp,
Holding back the tears that should've spilled over the dam of her eyelids - she held back
Wheleving tears wishing to weep only to stay strong, in front of me
I held 'Mr. Snuggles' with my other hand
The rattle in his body - the only hopeful chimes that rangabout in that desolated room
While I gazed into the box of where you slept
Your soft cheeks dusted with pink peony
You hair, silken ribbons of milk chocolate mixed with caramel streams
While a cream dress hugged your figure loosely
I wish I could've wrapped my tiny arms around you.
I imagined you'd give one of those embraces that can make anyone's frown flutter to smile.
That could make someone feel like they're squeezing a cloud made of cotton warmed by the sunlight
When you died, I heard so many sweet things about you -
How you were the honeyed nectar from a glass shiny jar,
That would pour into a porcelain cup - into the bitter tea of our family -
Just to make the family events a little less dreary
Your mother had told me, you were sleeping beauty -
Casted in a slumber, awaiting for a prince
To awaken her from this nightmare.
I couldn’t help to believe
I was only 4
I kept wondering
When you would come back
Instead, you were kissed by flame.
Your casket engulfed in a cranberry heat
Until all was left
Is specks of dried rosemary
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A piece on the first family death I remember
I wanted to write something in maintain the memory in a child-like manner
While also acknowledging the importance that no one should go through loss alone