Hushed by fear;
unsilenced in the name of time.
In knowledge, burdened,
and in love all the same.
Nothing is ever what it seems,
and in desperation,
the craved world peels away, and nothing
is left but the truth; shallow and somber.
My bleeding wounds can never heal,
because they cry missing your face.
Though you are not yet gone,
my tears will still fall for you,
because they need something to
remember you by.
I wish you would let go of me first,
so I would not have to bear the pain myself.
I have wings, and I will be fine,
once there is a day
that you are not my everything.
My words; you have read them,
perhaps you have even pondered,
but did you ever hear them?
Did you ever feel them?
Their meaning was hidden,
but it was there for you to see.
Just like it is now.
Please see it.
I never was strong.
And who can blame me?
The world is not worth being strong for.
I would rather fade into the darkness, like a phantom.
Tumble down a flight of stairs,
for hell might be heaven after all.
Or bleed to death like a crimson rose,
dangling in front of an innocent face,
forever and eternity,
taunting.
I love you.
You cannot be mad at that,
and I can never look at you the same again.
But that is a lie,
for this love is no secret.
It has been ignored, perhaps for the best,
but never spoken.
And it is more profound than even I know.
You cannot see, but I am holding onto you.
For dear sanity.
I cannot envision a world,
in which there is no you,
and though you are not leaving,
you are not staying, either.
And for that I am guilty.
And painfully sorry.
More sorry than I have ever been before,
Because it is wrong to love.
And love is not a word to be tossed around.
Especially not to you.
Love is not something I even believe in.
So where does this come from?
Nowhere special,
just my heart.