I remember how soundly you’d sleep, so close to me,
So close to me that I could still smell myself
And the way our skin had laid on top of each other.

I remember sitting down with you, where in the distance
The waves, like they had for centuries, rolled to shore.
But it was not the sea I had known before
Because it was not your tide soaking the sands.

I remember how brave you were, and the iron
That composed your mechanical heart.
Whenever I drew near it, I would find it lost to me
Rare as the one thing I could never claim—no matter how I yearned.

I remember that, when I could not love myself,
You could love me, and that made me love again.
And that you would never be carefree, but instead
Be bound by whatever objection passed—though you could seem it.

I remember how affected you were by the little things,
And not what the little things should be—like satin skin
Or the way the moon would mesh the sands, the sky, the sea
But all of the little things, things to do with me.

I remember the day I took my secrets away
And revoked each dream that I placed in you.
The heat was just too much, and our love the fuel.
You knew how that fire ate at us, day by day.

I remember that you made me beautiful,
And that if you taught me one thing, it was to be proud.
Not of what people saw me as, but what I was without the others
And all the things that my dreams could make me into.

But I remember when there was no hope left.
I just couldn’t find it in those chocolate eyes
That resemble now only the dirt and filth
Which our time together caked onto you.

I remember when your words became meaningless
And the few whispers you could spare
Were nothing but sugar sprinkled over rotten meat
That I myself forgot to nourish, to chill.

I remember how quickly you came into me,
And how much quicker your roots had buried
So, so deep into my heart, halting—
Chilling and stilling its timeless beat.

I remember just how much quicker you took flight
And spread those soulful wings—how they caught the moon.
Of those broad monstrosities that sent you from me, I do recall
And how you’d gone without a single note; you left no song.

I remember living in the trail of broken hearts you’d left
Knowing that their love would never amount to mine,
While hoping for the hope you’d once had in me—
Or just to hold you one last time, to tie you down.

I remember how, after you, I never took for granted—
But I also remember how I never lied to you,
And I suppose I shouldn’t start now.
You were granted to me, the prize I never tried to keep.

I remember looking at myself in that cold mirror—
And whenever I find beauty?
Well, that’s not me in the mirror…
It’s you.