love it. it is so touching. this is the best piece ever

Amazing. Writing like this is so important

Wow. Simply remarkable, I am a new user o this website but upon reading this poem I feel compelled to start my own piece right away. This poem really capture the true emotion of these children that others take for granted. Well done.

This was a really deep and strong poem. It reminded me of the children in Palestine and Syria that are lost and alone. It makes me sad because no one is helping them and we are too busy being greedy. We take our blessed life, education, and environment for granted and we should be more thankful that we are not in that position. And those children are real survivors and real soldiers.

This was a really touching poem, it was amazing. It really makes me sad because we take so much for granted when they want something as little as a toy car when we expect more. I loved this piece because it contained such detail, although I would suggest a little better word choice. This was a deep thinking poem and you have great potential!!

I agree completley with, AbigailGilgal

Most people take things for granted. but the people who think about  other and the more important things rather than when someone is getting a phone or somthing, those people that think about the sad things like in this poem can teach alot of other people. well done

I for real just started crying. This is an amazing piece. Guys, lets do something about this. I know I will definatly remember to pray for these childen. Thank you so much for this touching poem.

I thought this was an extremely beautiful & emotional piece. Thank you for sharing a rare perspective to look through.

Really meaningful and  true. Although, I have to admit, I'm the type of person who enjoys metaphors. I suggest describing the pain of the children as something more. Also, describe more about what is going on in their heads. Good job though !

Affection**

Deffidently one of my favorites. The author did an amazing job deffining the effection for this peice of poetry.

This poem made me realize the reality going on in some parts of the world. I feel like making a difference now. Anyways, good poem!

This is the best critique ever.

I read the first line and I got goose bumps. This poem tells the ugly truth of this world. How some kids have to suffer all the time. It made me think how ridiculous some of us can sometimes be, we complain about our homework and some even because they didn’t get the newest Iphone. It’s sad to think that what this poem tells is true but not from a book or a movie. Those innocent kids have had to face more horrible things than I will probably have to face my entire life.  It made me think how good my life is.                                                           The poem is well written and really affected me.  

Wow...all this time we write about how we feel, our experiences, and our memories. But what a daring step to consider another viewpoint, especially one like this. Well done!

I think this poem would be better as a short story. However, the descriptions really created a sad picture in my mind.

  I'm sorry to say this, but this really does not sound like a poem. It sounds like a paragraph you decided to space out and attempt to pass as free verse. One of the main points of poetry is that it's a way to treat language like a toy rather than a tool. This is the format where you're allowed to ignore the normal rules of writing, but not only do you not bother to get creative with the writing, you treat the rules like they're still necessary. Each 1-3 lines is a complete thought, the first letter is always capitalized, there's always a period at the end. It's just really boring, and doesn't seem like you put too much thought in the layout.   As for the words themselves, they're not that great either. Out of 26 lines, 9 start with some form of their or the. 3 starts with eyes, though I would have guessed more with the amount of times you use that word throughout the course of the poem (their eyes, these eyes, etc.). Using the same word so often makes it seems like you have a very limited vocabulary, and can be somewhat obnoxious to people who tend to notice these kinds of things.   I think some of these problems could be improved just by switching to a different perspective. Right now you’re taking the perspective of an outsider, a sympathetic one, mind you, but still someone who has no attachment to that situation aside from sympathy. Because of this, you’re stuck trying to tell us why we should care, over-emphasizing the traits you think will lead to the biggest emotional response: focusing on their eyes (Eyes that catch attention for their beauty.) or their helplessness (They silently tell of innocence lost and of silent tears cried.) This isn’t necessarily a wrong approach, but it is a very ineffectual one. If you want to make your audience feel for something, you should show them why they should. Instead of taking the view of someone unconnected, be someone involved. Start your poem from the eyes of a child soldier, or a soldier on the other side, or a mother fearing that her children will be taken away from here. Make it personal, instead of just sad. If you do that, you might find that a better writing style and tone might happen naturally. Also, as a small nitpick, the sentence “Children who are innocent are being ruined by men who see no hope in their government.” makes it sound as though the simple act of having no faith in your government hurts children, which isn’t true. Involving children in something they have no business being involved in hurts children. 

The subject of this poem is something I've thought long on. The author did such an amazing job capturing the true feeling of losing child innocence because of people that don't care.